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Chapter 1

🕑 Added 2025-03-22 07:50:55 +0000 UTC

Comments

M D

The options for commenting at RR are much better. In fact i copied the sentences, marked my insertions in different colors and transferred them back here to the comment sections. But everything was put back to black, so to say. 🤷🏻‍♂️

M D

Editsuggestion: „This condition had made him excessively careful, to the point of paranoia.“ I think the last part of the sentence is unnecessary, because his condition was already mentioned previously. „Remembering his condition, Han Luo  reached into his pocket and pulled out a small black notebook.“ Maybe ‚Remembering his situation‘ would be more fitting, (if you need any prelude to showing the notebook at all), because he’s writing down his observations to improve his situation. „Since they would all be living under in / under the rule of the same sect, it was best to be prepared.“ „"Welcome, all of you, to Luo Xian Sect."“ As it is the Vice Sect Leader who is speaking, a venerable old man. I think that he wouldn’t shorten his speech or use informal language.


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