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An Otherworldly Scholar - 97
🕑 Added 2024-02-01 23:22:28 +0000 UTCIt was finally time to pay my dues. [Awareness] bombarded me with the hundred and one different dangers of dealing with nobility. I took a deep breath and silenced the skill. We were not the prince’s key to victory but a small cog in his political machine. Our task was clear: support the royalist faction to cement their influence over the rest of noble families.
I wasn’t sure how my presence at the feast would help to achieve anything.
The invitation letter was brief; as a participant in the Stephaniss tournament, I was kindly invited to the yearly memorial feast for the former Marquis. I wasn’t invited because of my good looks, and I was definitely not invited because of my notorious dinner jokes. The Marquis wanted me to parade before the nobles, but I lacked any political weight to drag lesser nobles to the royalist faction.
Maybe I was merely bait.
Promoting an armed conflict left a bitter taste in my mouth, but my number one priority was to ensure the long-term survival of the orphanage. I dipped in the bathtub and scrubbed off all the dirt I had gathered during the hunting trip with Ilya. The warm water eased the tension on my shoulders. In front of me, there was a fine assortment of high-quality magical soaps and balms. Elincia had pulled out the big guns.
“Left to right, head to toe,” I muttered to myself to remember the order in which I was supposed to apply the infusions. The silver lining was that Captain Kiln wasn’t there to apply her renowned [Power Scrubbing] on me. The Scholar Class lacked the defensive capabilities to withstand such abuse.
I heated the water a couple of degrees using mana and closed my eyes for a second. My aspirations to break physics with magic were long gone, but at least the early work with mana manipulation helped me to develop my control over mana. I wondered if the System's creator had put a safeguard in place to prevent people like me from accidentally splitting atoms.
I shook my head. There was no time to waste on superfluous thoughts. I grabbed the shampoo and massaged my hair. It wasn’t as long as it was during college, but it was getting there. The lather covered my head. It smelled like mint, which was strange considering how used I was to floral scents. I rinsed the shampoo with bathwater and continued with an oily cream. This one smelled of live Fire Vine Pods.
I was very careful not to get any in my eyes.
Across the hall, I heard Nasiah, Ginz, and Captain Kiln fiercely yelling at each other. Elincia’s garment was becoming a point of contention between those three. It would be a touching scene if they weren’t insulting each other’s ancestors. At least I had the peace of mind that they worried about the well-being of the orphanage.
I quickly shaved and rinsed off. Although a warm bath was a gift from the heavens after days of traversing the wilderness, I couldn’t remain in the bathtub forever. The increasing uproar coming from Elincia’s room made me think she needed support. After drying myself with an old towel, I put on a simple white shirt and riding breeches and left my bedroom.
The yelling intensified to alarming levels as I walked down the corridor.
I opened the door.
Nasiah violently pulled on strings, and the modest yellow dress adopted Elincia’s slim figure. It wasn’t a hundred percent perfect fit, as the dress’s shoulders were a bit wide for Elincia, but it was close. Nasia and Ginz both grabbed a pincushion and started fixing the surplus fabric. Considering Elincia’s expression, she definitely needed support.
“My father gifted me that dress when I was thirteen. He was still hoping he could marry me with a man of the Farcrest Family,” Captain Kiln said.
The dress was slightly too wide for Elincia despite her strong archer shoulders. Captain Kiln must have been a tall and robust thirteen-year-old to fill it. It wasn’t a surprise. Despite being past her prime, Captain Kiln still maintained a sharp physique. If I hadn’t seen her Character Sheet before, I would’ve suspected she was at least a quarter orc.
“You were going to marry the Marquis?” Elincia asked, her arms extended as Ginz and Nasiah worked on the dress.
“Tauron hadn’t yet been born when I was thirteen. My father had his older brother, Rikard, in sight. May the System let his soul rest in peace,” the Captain replied. She might have noticed my questioning look because she quickly explained. “He died during the Forest Warden’s Monster Surge; seventeen years old, Lv.35.”
I nodded in silence. Risha was Lv.34 after fighting in the Farlands for seven years. Rikard, on the other hand, reached a similar level in only two years. I could only imagine what monsters he faced to reach that level at such a young age.
“Captain Kiln was the one who killed the Warden, if you are curious. Since then, she’s regarded as a citywide hero,” Ginz pointed out.
Captain Kiln shook her head. “Rikard and Lord Stephaniss did most of the work. I only survived long enough to strike the final blow,” Captain Kiln looked at me directly. “Generations of Farcrests, Kilns, Abeis, and Holsts have bled for this city to survive, Rob. Don’t forget that.”
I raised my palms in defeat. My views on nobility weren’t a secret for anyone, but I wasn’t going to smear the names of the city's founding families just because of that.
“Did the Marquis send any instructions?” I asked. If I was going to be Farcrest’s poster-boy, I better memorize the lines my employer wanted me to say.
Captain Kiln gave me a questioning look.
“Ginz and Miss Nasiah are trustworthy,” I quickly said.
Captain Kiln nodded. “I’m going to put it in simple terms. The campaign is in a bad spot because the Three Great Houses, House Osgiria, House Herran, and House Gairon, are comfortable with the status quo. Opening a new trade route could put their business in danger. Turning them to our side would be unlikely, so don’t worry about them until the tournament.”
“Right,” I said, relieved.
I didn’t wholly agree with Captain Kiln. Politically speaking, today’s enemy could be tomorrow’s commercial ally. It happened with Japan and Germany, so I hadn’t the slightest doubt that was the case in this world too. If the big houses saw a benefit from the new trade route, they’d jump into the royalist wagon in the blink of an eye. The rest would follow just to save face and not arrive late to the repartition of spoils.
Not that it was something I could achieve.
“For now, your job will be to entertain the nobles,” Captain Kiln finally said.
The words didn’t make sense at first.
“Entertain?” I asked. Even if my attention span was flimsy at times, I knew ‘entertaining nobles’ had little to do with the complex web of economic and political relationships within noble houses.
“We are in the middle of nowhere, Robert. It’s winter. The main problem of the royal army currently is that everyone wants to go home,” Captain Kiln said. “They are bored, and you are the most entertaining thing in kilometers. Think about it. You belong to a completely different country with different traditions and customs.”
I sighed. Even if I was technically allied with the Marquis and the crowned prince, I was a low-level grunt for them, at least until the tournament started.
“Tell them about motor-bikes! And planes! And—” Elincia said from the top of the stool. The naïve excitement in her voice was nothing but heartwarming.
Nasiah shut her down with the jab of a pin.
“I guess I can entertain some nobles. It would not be that different from telling my class about my vacations on the first day of class,” I sighed, half relieved and half disappointed. If Captain Kiln had given me a couple of weeks of notice, I would’ve prepared a Rubik’s cube or some other nifty contraption to blow their minds away.
Nasiah interrupted us. Elincia was ready. “What do you think, Captain?”
The yellow dress was now a second skin around Elincia’s body to the point she couldn’t freely breathe. I wasn’t up to date with the Ebros’ fashion scene, but Elincia was stunning even with the dozen pins protruding from the dress. She gave me a distressed smile.
“Too anachronistic. I told you that dress was ‘classic’ thirty years ago,” Captain Kiln clicked her tongue in disgust.
“Anything newer looks like a tent on her!” Nasiah angrily replied.
“It’s not my fault Elincia is a half-elf twig!” Captain Kiln said.
“It’s not going to work, that’s for sure,” Ginz pointed out, examining Elincia’s appearance with his expert eye. “Nobody will want to be seen near a lowborn skinny half-elf. We need something more striking. Something that would distract the nobles from the fact Elincia is Elincia.”
“I think Elincia is beautiful,” I pointed out.
“Shut it, Scholar, this is your fault,” Nasia said. “You decided to make the name Rosebud famous by naming your silly fencing school after Elincia. Now nobles will expect something more than a piss poor governess.”
“It’s okay, Rob. I was happy—” Elincia tried to speak under the pressure of the dress, but she was cut short.
“Shut it, Discount Dryad!” Nasiah yelled.
The pile of ‘used’ dresses on the bed told me everything I had to know about the fashion complications we were experiencing. I sighed. We were reaching unhealthy levels of stress, but nothing college didn’t prepare me for. We had a problem. We just needed a solution. I crossed the room and dug into the pile of dresses. It was like seeing a timeline of Captain Kiln’s physical prowess.
Ginz, Captain Kiln, and Nasiah fiercely discussed the kind of attire Elincia should use. Ginz argued that something more motherly would fit the ‘governess’ aesthetic, while Captain Kiln said a mystical Alchemist vibe was the correct answer. Nasia, for her part, shot down every idea with her sharp tongue.
“Elincia lacks the bust and the hips to look like a fertility icon, and we’ve already been doing business under the nose of the Alchemists Guild, so it wouldn’t be wise to taunt them with a mystic Alchemist look,” Nasiah grunted.
Nasiah and the Captain entered a shouting match for the next five minutes over our potion deal. In the meantime, Elincia climbed off the stool and put her head on my shoulder. I couldn’t tell if she was angry, tired, or resigned. Maybe it was all of the above.
“How are you doing?” I asked.
“It’s kinda funny. A few months ago, I was all alone, and now I have people arguing over my dress,” Elincia replied, covering her smile with a hand.
“We should be more selective going forward. You know, to keep crazy people away from the orphanage,” I said as Ginz joined the shouting match. Nasiah and Captain Kiln were like cats and dogs.
“I like feisty people,” Elincia shrugged as she stealthily pulled a couple of the pins, keeping the fabric tight on her chest. Having released the pressure, she took a deep breath. “So, any ideas for my outfit? You come up with good ideas occasionally.”
I rolled my eyes.
A dark blue mounting dress had caught my attention. Even with a high-level Craftsman within our ranks, time would be our greatest constraint. We needed to work on something pre-made. In the corner of the room were several rolls of fabric and cloth. Despite the short notice, the Marquis had been farsighted enough to provide us with the necessary material.
An idea was brewing in my mind.
“My philosophy teacher was a charlatan, you know?” I said as a smile tugged my lips. “He once told the class that a woman’s most beautiful part was her back because you don’t know yet how she looks. You only see your own expectations.”
“He sounds like a charlatan, but I see where he was going. We don’t have to meet the nobles' expectations; we just have to string them along,” Elincia said as she thoughtfully tapped her lips. Then, she took a piece of expensive cloth from the pile and covered her mouth. “Do I look more beautiful to you, Mister Clarke?”
I laughed. “You could hardly look more beautiful to me.”
Her bright emerald eyes were mesmerizing.
“Mister Lowell warned me about sweet-talking men like you,” Elincia giggled, her face blushing ever so slightly.
“Are you okay with this?” I asked. Even if nobles had high expectations about the woman who gave her name to the fencing school, I didn’t want to force Elincia to take an active role in my entanglement with nobility.
“If we can convince them we are the next big thing, I’m in,” Elincia replied with a mischievous smile.
A plan hatched in my mind. Light stones were far from a perfect light source; they were closer to a candle than a light bulb. We could exploit the darkened environment to hide Elincia’s features and feed the nobles' expectations. It was a gimmicky plan at best, but it would buy us enough time to prepare something more produced.
“Alright, kids,” I said, clapping my hands. “Who can tell me a person’s most attractive feature?”
They all looked at me like I was clinically insane.
Nasiah called me a cheating bastard, but the smile on her face told me everything I had to know. They were sold on my idea. The focus of attention changed from Elincia to the pile of dresses. The best part about concealing Elincia under layers of fabric was that we didn’t need perfect fits.
Ginz assembled a dress, using the blue mounting dress as a starting point. Then he added a mantle around the shoulders, a long skirt with pleats, a translucent face veil, and a petticoat to give the cloak more volume. By the end of the discussion, we had assembled a somewhat androgynous set, just in the sweet spot between orb-pondering wizard and arcane priestess, that hid most of Elincia’s features except for her eyes.
“Elincia, you know you choose a trickster as a partner, don’t you?” Nasiah asked.
Coming from her, I took it as a compliment.
After briefly discussing the best appliqués for the cloak, Ginz grabbed the dress and took it to his workshop. Although we were racing against time, I trusted Ginz to prepare the dress for the evening. I had come to understand how overpowered Crafters were among crafting classes. Maybe he wasn’t as specialized as a Tailor, but he could work fabric as well as any earthly designer.
“The best part about the dress is that I won’t have to wear makeup,” Elincia said, full of herself.
Captain Kiln put her huge hands on Elincia’s shoulders and pushed her down to her seat. I used [Minor Illusion] to summon the figure of the younger Elincia that Loki had shown me months before. I didn’t have a strong stance on makeup, but heavy black eyeliner perfectly suited her.
“No, I’m not going back to that,” Elincia struggled to stand up. Unfortunately for Elincia, the Book of Classes stated that Knights had A-rank strength while Alchemists only had E-rank strength.
“Trust me, your sham Scholar sweetheart will not be able to keep his hands to himself after this,” Nasiah mischievously smiled as she pulled a make-up set out of nowhere.
I swallowed, fearing she was right.
* * *
Despite the rush, Elincia’s outfit came out perfect. The cloak and the veil covered her features, shrouding her in an aura of mystery while remaining elegant and sober. [Night Vision] made her emerald eyes shine like the eyes of a cat in the dark, adding even more allure to her presence.
My heart skipped a beat every time our eyes met.
My transformation wasn’t as spectacular. I wore the Rosebud Academy uniform with nice boots and a short cape over the shoulders to add ‘volume’ to my figure. Captain Kiln strapped an old ornate sword from my side, and Nasiah slicked my hair back like a villain of a cheap action movie.
“It seems Elincia wants to perform some [Lay on Hands] action on Rob,” Captain Kiln laughed.
“No, I don't!” Elincia replied.
We laughed now that the tension had passed. I excused myself and ran to my bedroom to grab the instant camera. The situation warranted a photo. We stood in the middle of Elincia’s room; everyone except Elincia was perplexed as I asked them to stand still. I warned them about the flash, set the timer, and ran back to pose by Elincia’s side.
“This better not be a practical joke,” Captain Kiln said after the shutter clicked.
“You’ll see,” I replied, taking the photograph.
Just as expected, Captain Kiln’s brains were blown. The photo was good despite Ginz’s restless expression: Elincia and I were sitting in the middle, Captain Kiln stood straight to the right, and Ginz and Nasiah to the left. It almost looked like a parent and student photo on graduation day.
“If you bring that to the party, you’ll be the night sensation,” Captain Kiln said, her eyes shining like an excited kid.
“There’s only a few uses left, and I'd rather use it in the orphanage,” I replied.
Captain Kiln nodded, somewhat sad. I made a mental note to leave it in a safe place. I knew my people; Nasiah would want to sell it for profit, while Ginz would love to disassemble it. Before they could start bartering, I scurried away to take a photo of Ilya with the Iceshard Boar. I suddenly felt nostalgic. Soon, my class would be all adults, and only time would tell where they’d end up.
After taking the pictures, we reunited in the vestibule. The kids were excited by Elincia’s dress and would let her go until after a double round of hugs and several promises of returning before bedtime. After receiving a few leftover hugs myself, Captain Kiln guided us outside. In front of the orphanage, an elegant carriage of black varnished wood and silvery handrails pulled by two beautiful horses awaited us.
“Bring me cake!” Shu yelled from the doorway.
Captain Kiln opened the door, and I entered first. A tall man with broad shoulders and a stern look was already sitting inside the carriage. He was dressed in elegant black and green military clothes with golden buttons. Several medals hung from his chest. His hair was combed back in the same fashion as mine, and his beard was perfectly groomed to the occasion. His mere presence told me he wasn’t an ordinary commoner.
“Good afternoon, My Lord,” I greeted, cursing Captain Kiln for not warning me about our carriage companion.
“I’m Janus, you asshat,” he grunted in the well-known voice of the rugged swordsman.
Comments
Gingiberry
Nothing so insulting and complimentary at the same time as cleaning up so well no one recognizes you
Kalmars
A family photo before disaster perhaps, great chapter
