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Newly Summoned Demoness - Chapter 49 – Checkpoint

🕑 Added 2023-10-16 03:50:14 +0000 UTC

Comments

Yandron

And I found the number error again: One of the soldiers moved down the line to them a clipboard in hand. “Party of six?” Should be party of five. That one really is hidden in a lot of chapters. Story is still very good! Far better than the first version. Forgot this one later in the chapter: “Lieutenant Gaston! Six for additional screening.”

M. Lampi

Nobody likes border patrol/TSA. Suggestion: A few were even holding theirs at the read... rifles? ==> A few were even holding theirs at the ready... rifles?

Jonathan Wint

I like how you got it separated in collections!


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