ylvy
patreon
Journey towards healing
🕑 Added 2024-12-25 11:23:12 +0000 UTCI'm doing some thinking about my art journey.
Long term I might transition into dropping the commission tiers I hv n stick with a streamlined 'style'. I honestly really want to stay away from doing lineart. As time goes I realized how much it constricts me n I'm probably only doing it because that's what I think people want rather than what I enjoy doing.
I think I'd love to double down on doing art the way I want to.
I still struggle with the idea that people might have problems with it (self-esteem issues), but at least I want to try.
I think I've never openly stated that due to a time when I was forced to draw for work in ways that is unhealthy, I have a bad trauma reaction to the act of drawing now. Even though I LOVE art, every time I face the canvas I'm face-to-face with my demons again.
It's hard.
Before last year, I was also barely making any money with my art n I lost all confidence in my abilities. I came back trying to focus on the positive things of what I'm doing, n to focus on the joy I'm bringing to however many people that finds it in my art.
And in a way, that started my healing journey. But I know it's gonna take time. Whenever I had setbacks (which due to my health, I have many) it brought me back to that dark prison. I'm thankful that at least now, I have a lot of support from those who care about me, and my art. It really does help a lot, so thank you to yall, you know who you are.
As I get more commissions I was also building confidence, I felt needed. Of course that's a great thing. I've been blessed by many commissioners who are passionate about their characters n ideas n that positively affects me. In a way, I don't want to make my commissioners feel like I'm not giving my all for their commissions, of course not at all! I've gone n done my very absolute best for my commissions. I think the joy many of them expresses is a testament to that.
Still though, I know it's a long process.
No doubt, I need all the help that I can get to stand up strong again. I hope someday I can find the joy in facing the canvas again, with my tablet in hand, dripping ecstasy onto the canvas without my demons to disrupt me.
Please continue to be kind to me, and to support me ♥️
Comments
Thorgonator
And I can't vouch for everyone, but when I hire an artist, it's *because* of their style, not in spite of it. I truly love the piece you made for me!
Thorgonator
Of course! You deserve it.
Ylvy
Honestly, I'm naturally not too anal about style n all, it's just that I have a tendency to overthink about what people want at the expense of my ownself, and do that long n hard enuf, I start to lose myself, lose my joy. I wanna take the steps to heal, zone in on what I genuinely resonate with again. Thank you, Thorg, you've been such a huge pillar of support to me. Truly appreciate you ❤️
Dobraukin
Happy to support you, Ylvy! You are awesome, hard worker and very talented! Love every piece of artwork you create... it's always fantastic! Let's hope that, step by step, you feel better as soon as possible, doing what you like most! Wishing you all the best for this upcoming 2025... and for every year to come!! ❤🙏❤
Thorgonator
Happy to support you through it! And as far as compiling into a single style, I thing that's great, too! You've got a particular set of skills, and I'd love to see you focus on them. In the meantime, I'll do what I can to support ❤️
Ylvy
You were always so understanding and supportive, Soye'kin. You were there when I was small, and also when I was at my worst. I owe so much to you! Thank you so much, I have no way to repay you, but I will always remember how much you've done for me and try to create art that you can enjoy 💖
Ylvy
All the support I've received has made my burden much lighter and my journey much smoother. So from the bottom of my heart, I thank you, Lenny 🫂💖
Soye'kin the Lurker
You came back after a one and half year hiatus and finished my commission, and that's the moment I decided I want to come along with you till the end. You are a passionate artist but most importantly you are a honest, professional artist who stick to their promises. Just know I'll always support you and please don't hesitate on asking for Help :D.
LennyFaceLarry
I'm glad to support you. You're an incredibly talented artist and I love your work. I wish you all the strength you need 🫂💖
