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Unintended Cultivator V5: Chapter 44 – No Direct Pressure
🕑 Added 2023-11-08 10:12:12 +0000 UTC“You’re welcome to come along, of course,” said Sen in the most offhanded and casual tone he could manage.
After discussing his plans with Fu Ruolan, he’d reflected on how he’d taken it almost for granted that Falling Leaf would come with him. He didn’t like that he’d done that at all. While he had valid if obnoxious reasons to venture back into those old familiar territories, she didn’t to his knowledge. She’d certainly never expressed a desire to do so, except for the very occasional comment that she’d like to see Uncle Kho’s mountain again. That made sense to Sen. Falling Leaf might not be afflicted with a lot of nostalgia, but that mountain had been home to her for a very long time before he’d come along and turned everyone’s lives upside down. He wasn’t going there, though.
So, if she did come along, it would only be to keep him company while he went and did things that didn’t really stand to benefit her. If she stayed, she could continue her training with Fu Ruolan. In fact, she’d probably get more and better training without him around to distract both her and the nascent soul cultivator. He couldn’t make the decision for her, either way. He could, however, avoid putting any kind of direct pressure on her. He was certain that she’d do it without hesitation if he asked her to come. If he just threw it out there that she could come, if she wanted to, that let her make the choice that worked best for her without feeling like she had to tell him no. He’d also considered that some of the little side errands he was considering might actually be easier if he was traveling alone.
As the silence dragged on for a while, Sen glanced over at Falling Leaf. She looked torn. He couldn’t really blame her for that. He would have died without her help when they’d come looking for Fu Ruolan. He’d have pushed too hard and gotten himself killed by some spirit beast a dozen times without her watching out for him. Of course, the situation wasn’t exactly the same. Once he knew that he’d be traveling, he’d gone ahead formed another layer to his core. He wanted it done and out of the way before he left. Especially if there was going to be a tribulation attached. It seemed the heavens truly did believe he’d suffered enough recently because there had been no hint of divine lightning or anything else that one might think of a tribulation. Granted, he had substantial work to do in getting full control over his advancements which carried some risks, but he wasn’t dying this time. He could still push too hard, but it wasn’t a forgone conclusion that it would kill him anymore.
“I want to stay,” said Falling Leaf, sounding frustrated at her own words.
“That’s a good plan,” said Sen. “You’re in the middle of training with a weapon. It’s better if you learn all of the essentials together. I just wanted you to know that you could come if you wanted to.”
The guilt in her expression didn’t fade away entirely, but it was mostly gone the next time he glanced at her. He decided that was going to have to be good enough. He’d done everything he could to let her stay behind without feeling bad about it. She had to decide for herself that it was okay. She gave him a curious look.
“Will you go straight to the turtle?”
Sen shook his head. “No, I’ll make at least one stop along the way. See if Lo Meifeng is still in the capital. She’s still the most efficient way to get a letter to Master Feng that I know.”
“Is that wise? There may be people there who are angry with you.”
Sen let out a soft laugh. “There are people angry with me for one reason or another all over this kingdom. If I just never go places where they might be, I’ll have to leave the kingdom entirely.”
“That’s probably true. Still, Chan Yu Ming might be in the capital. Could you kill her if you had to?”
Sen felt the smile fade from his lips. He’d been making an effort not to think too hard about what might happen if he saw the princess again. He desperately hoped that time had given her some perspective on what had happened because he didn’t want to fight her. Of course, that wasn’t the question that Falling Leaf had asked him. Could I kill Chan Yu Ming? A moment of soul searching gave him an answer. It wasn’t one he liked but liking the answer wasn’t really required.
“Yes. If she pushed it that far, I could kill her.”
“But you don’t want to fight her.”
“Of course not. She’s got plenty of reasons to be angry with me. It’s hard to fault her. Besides, I thought she was someone you liked.”
Falling Leaf grimaced. “She is. Even I can understand why she’d want to hurt you. But if it’s a choice between her and you, I pick you.”
“I’d never ask you to do anything to her. I’d never ask you pick.”
“I know. It doesn’t mean it won’t happen anyway.”
Sen hated when she said things like that. It always felt like some kind of awful prophecy that was definitely going to happen now that she’d voiced the words out loud.
“Well, I’ll do my best to steer clear of her. The odds are good that she’s gone back to the Clear Spring Sect. It has been a while.”
Falling Leaf didn’t look convinced but let it go in favor of another topic. “Do you know how long you’ll be gone?”
Sen offered her half of a shrug. “I’ve got some educated guesses. I mean, I’m not planning on stopping anywhere for long. Plus, there won’t be any pesky searching going on. I know exactly where to go. Assuming I can move as fast as I think I can, a few months of hard travel. Is there anything you want me to get you while I’m traveling?”
“No,” said Falling Leaf, seeming wholly disinterested.
“Really? Nothing at all?”
She just shook her head at him. Sen wasn’t sure why this surprised him. Aside from her brief adventure in buying furniture, she’d never shown any interest in things before. He’d have to keep an eye out for something she might like. Maybe another warehouse of food in a storage ring, he thought.
“Any messages for Auntie Caihong, Uncle Kho, or Master Feng?”
Falling Leaf seemed to give that one question much deeper thought. She’d seemed to develop a much deeper relationship with Auntie Caihong when they’d all been out searching for him. Yet, they’d parted company easily enough. He’d never been quite sure what the story was there and hadn’t pried. As Lo Meifeng had told him, curiosity wasn’t its own justification. It simply hadn’t been his business if she didn’t want to share the details with him.
“You can tell them about my new training,” she said, nodding to herself as though she’d made some good decision. “I’m sure they’ll be interested.”
Sen resisted the urge to ask a bunch of questions. Not your business, he reminded himself.
“I’ll do that,” he said, and moved on to the practicalities. “I know the cold doesn’t really bother you, but I went ahead and split some wood for the fire. You should have enough for a couple of weeks, but you’ll need to gather more after that.”
“I can do that.”
“You’ll also need it if you want warm baths,” he noted.
That seemed to get her attention. Sen usually warmed the water in the bath using his qi, a feat that Falling Leaf couldn’t duplicate. She nodded a little more vigorously. He tried to think of anything else he might need to tell her or remind her about and came up empty. They’re lives were so simple that there just weren’t that many things to discuss about it. He checked his storage rings one last time to make sure he had the essential camping gear and food. Much like Falling Leaf, he could simply ignore the winter cold. Just because it wouldn’t kill him, though, it didn’t make enduring it more pleasant. Sen was not of the opinion that self-inflicted suffering built character. In his experience, it usually just led to poor sleep. Having dealt with everything he could think of, he stepped toward the door.
“Be careful, Sen. Do not let your new strength make you careless of your safety,” said Falling Leaf.
He gave her a serious look to show that he was giving her words their due weight. “I will be ever mindful.”
Seemingly satisfied, she stood from her chair and stepped outside into the winter cold with him. He’d only get a few hours of real travel in before early winter evening set in, but a motivated core cultivator at his stage could cover an almost absurd amount of ground in a few hours. Enough ground that he wouldn’t have thought it was just something someone made up when he was a child. He smiled a little. Every once in a while, he tried to imagine what that younger version of himself would make of what he had become in the years between. Would he have been able to recognize himself, or would the older Sen have seemed like some impossible thing from a story? He wasn’t sure, but he thought it was a useful exercise. Cultivators spent so much of their time look forward, striving toward the heights of those cultivators who came before them. Sen wasn’t immune to that habit, but he thought it sometimes blinded cultivators.
Looking back let him see how far he had come. That child Master Feng first found looked almost unrecognizable to him now. Even the person who first stepped off the mountain to go explore the world struck him as largely a stranger. That young man had been full of grand ideals, most of which the world had rather unceremoniously smashed to pieces. He’d been naïve to just how harsh and unforgiving the world could be to the unwary. Not that it had all been bad and not everyone had turned out to be awful. Luo Min and her mother back on that farm. They had been kind. The patriarch of the Clear Spring Sect had his moments of kindness. Sen had been more disappointed by that man’s failings than angry about them. Prince Jing had turned out to be so honorable that Sen wasn’t sure what to do with him. Grandmother Lu and her employees had proven themselves time and time again. The Even the Stormy Ocean Sect had turned out to harbor those with more sense. No, it hadn’t been all bad, and it was important to remind himself of that on occasion. Otherwise, he could fall into the trap of seeing everyone as enemies.
On a whim, Sen turned and gave Falling Leaf a hug. He’d thought she might pull away, but she didn’t. They stood there like that for a long time, tiny snowflakes falling around them. Sen finally pulled back and gave her a smile.
“I’ll be back before you know it.”
Comments
Jesse
I definitely ship FL and Sen.
Valderan
It has an appeal and this story does it reasonably well. Sen's internal reflections can work out to fill the page meaningfully but most of a given story is interactions between people. What could be a chapter rich in interest due to the presence of one other person to talk to simply becomes "Sen travelled the land for a dozen years, simply enjoying the health of his new body."
Thunderhoof
I hope Sen travels alone this time.
Sammot
Honestly it would be kinda nice to see other kingdoms, I wouldn't really mind if Sen left. After his deal with fu rolan of course
John Dovey
I heard that like I was watching Shawshank Redemption ;-)
Ekko
Oh, that means Sen is gone for at least a year or so
Divinor
Enter narrator: "He was not going to be back before she knew it."
