Bag of Depravity
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Missing-nin: Chapter 16
🕑 Added 2025-10-17 03:10:21 +0000 UTCChapter 16
Princess Gale
The door to a hybrid inn-tavern in Sawa no Kuni was thrown open. Around the room, men and women with rough faces sized up the newcomers. There was a blond boy, almost a youth, with the hood of his traveling cloak thrown back. He had one person with him— a woman, by the figure, but her hood was on. They weren’t natives. You could tell by their outfits, without a single animal fur anywhere on them. No one from Sawa no Kuni would show themselves in public like that. Each pelt you could squeeze into your outfit was a sign of your status here. To wear basic cloth meant you were foreign, or destitute.
The boy led the way to an empty table, humming a fast-paced song moderately off-key. His companion said nothing. They sat down and soon they weren’t interesting enough to keep watching… Although plenty of patrons kept in the corner of their eye. Giving strangers the benefit of the doubt in a nest was never a good idea.
Naruto was still humming when they were approached by the waiter. He was only a little older than Naruto and Hinata. Most likely the son of the owner.
“You should really stop singing,” the waiter said first.
“I concur,” Kyu said.
Naruto ignored his passenger. Or rather, he answered her out loud, speaking to the waiter at the same time. “C’mon, what do you have against Princess Gale?”
“Princes… Gale?” the waiter asked.
He was a local kid. This place — Ogawa Village — was a two-day trip from the closest theatre, tucked in the shadow of Mount Morikawa, one of the continent’s tallest peaks. It was ice melt off of the mountain that gave this small country, north of Kaze no Kuni, its moniker as the Land of Mountain Streams. Ogawa Village was just one more small settlement in its borders, until it had been co-opted by Missing-Nin to serve as a gathering place.
Naruto’s eyes lit up at the chance to proselytize a non-believer. He pounded both palms on the table and leaned over to the waiter. “You don’t know Princess Gale? She’s only the biggest movie star in all of Fire Country— no, the whole continent! The actress is Yukie Fujikaze. She’s played Princess Gale for years in all kinds of movies. There’s Princess Gale and the Shivering Samurai, Princess Gale and the Neverending Storm, Princess Gale and the New Dawn… they’re all smash hits! Her new movie just came out, called Princess Gale and the Army Beyond the Grave, and the theme is so stuck in my head right now. It goes, duh duh duh-duh, duh-duh, duuuuuh—”
“Hey, shhh!” the waiter said. “I get that you like this Princess Gale woman, but you should watch where you are. Don’t you see who’s sitting over there?”
He pointed to the middle of the room. A group of six men and two women were sitting around what was by far the biggest table, drinking heavily and playing a form of poker. Based on the amount of cards each player was holding, they were using the Land of Earth’s ruleset. Sitting with his back to Naruto, the two women of the group on either side of him, was a man as big (and almost as hairy) as a bear.
The group was laughing, but Naruto’s sharp eyes could pick out the cards some of them were holding. The bear-man put down a flush. He won the round. Naruto had watched a man with a royal flush fold without trying to play it. The big guy laughed and collected his winnings, settling his arms over the shoulders of the women once he’d pulled the chips to his side of the table.
“That’s Okamoto.” The waiter used a tray to shield his mouth, like he was worried about having his lips read. “He’s not like the others here. He’s originally from Iwa. They say he was almost a Jounin when he left.”
“So he’s from a major village,” Naruto said, staring at Okamoto’s back. White-and-purple scars were visible on the man’s neck that must have extended down his back. He was old for a missing-nin, being close to forty from the look of him. Either he defected late or he outperformed the missing-nin’s usual life-expectancy.
Naruto turned away from the man. He did what the waiter was asking and stopped singing, mostly because the poor kid looked ready to have an aneurysm over it. Naruto ordered two waters for himself and Hinata. They held off on getting food for now, although they had the money for it. Gaara’s traveling funds hadn’t run out yet, even if they were starting to dwindle.
“What will we be doing now?” Hinata asked.
Under her hood, her Byakugan was active. She turned it on as soon as they walked into the room. It was a reflex, feeling so much nearly-hostile attention on them. Over half the people in the room would attack in a heartbeat if they thought fighting Naruto and Hinata would earn them something.
Naruto, like always, was unbothered. He relaxed in his chair and set his elbows on the table.
“We wait here until work comes in,” he said.
“Th-That’s it?”
“It’s not like we can do much more. Missing-nin have to eat. If we wanna make money, we have to take missions like regular ninja. Only it’s up to us to seal the deal and get those jobs, instead of being assigned to them.”
Hinata looked stricken as she considered the idea that socializing might now be necessary to ensure her livelihood. Naruto could see the longing in her eyes for Konoha mission desk where she could be assigned a job she was suited for without thinking about a thing.
“It’s not all bad,” Naruto assured her. “Sure, sometimes it’s pretty rough getting work, but it also means we don’t have to do anything. If we don’t like a mission, we walk away from it. Nobody is stopping us!”
Hinata didn't see the full appeal, but she still smiled softly. “That’s nice.”
The waiter came back. He delivered tall glasses of water. Naruto snatched his cup and drank greedily. When he’d swallowed, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and sighed with delight. Instead of being offended about how Naruto practically ripped the glass away from him, the waiter looked proud.
Hinata tentatively drank from her own. It was so good that she deactivated her Byakugan by accident. She looked in shock at the glass she was holding, the water’s chill seeping out through the glass.
“Is it your first time having our water?” the waiter asked.
Hinata nodded her hooded head.
“It’s the best anywhere on the continent,” the waiter bragged. “Our stream comes directly off Mount Morikawa’s largest glacier. It’s so fresh that it doesn’t even need to be cleaned. The taste will ruin all other water for you.”
They ordered food now. There were three options: cabbage soup, grouse stew, and bear steak. The price rose sharply between each of the options. Naruto ordered them two bowls of grouse stew and looked with dismay as their traveling funds were reduced by half.
Only Okamoto, the ex-Iwa nin pointed out by the waiter, had a bear steak in front of him.
The food was good when it came. Naruto noticed the other patrons were watching what they ordered. When the waiter brought steaming bowls full of brown broth, everyone looked away from Naruto and Hinata.
Cabbage soup would have meant they were poor. In this line of work, that usually translated to weak. Or easily-exploited, depending on your inclination. Bear Steak would have meant they were rich. Dangerous, perhaps, but maybe also worth it. Fights were common inside nests. Even more common were kunai plunged into sleeping necks.
For now, Naruto and Hinata remained unremarkable. He’d like to keep it that way. It was such a hassle to beat the shit out of missing-nin, especially when they got their friends involved. He always ended up getting blood on his clothes that wouldn’t wash out.
“How do we find a client?” Hinata asked.
Naruto swished a bite of stew around his mouth before swallowing. It was good. Rich, and almost a little creamy.
“They usually find us.”
“How?” Hinata asked.
“Well, the whole point of nests is to get missing-nin together in one place. Clients’ll come here from all over and find the place with the most ninja hanging around. It’s usually some kind inn. Then, they see who approaches them. Or, if they’ve got something in mind, they might approach you first.”
Realization dawned in Hinata’s eyes. “Then we’re here because—?”
Naruto smiled at her. “Bingo. Possible paycheck number one, already inbound.”
He was referencing the soft set of footsteps coming from just outside the door. Naruto smelled perfume and cold steel. A woman and a guard. Definitely not from the village, then. No one here could afford a good katana, let alone services of a samurai who knew how to use one.
Although his senses were far stronger than anyone else in the room, the other missing-nin all had their own tricks. Somehow, at least half of them were sitting up straighter before the door opened. Landing a job was like a hunt. Whoever pounced first had the best chance of eating well.
Of course, there were always different hunting strategies. Okamoto and his gang were still playing poker. Not a single one of them had noticed the imminent arrival. He took his arm off one of the women just long enough to drink from a tall glass of alcohol, laughing boisterously.
The door opened.
It was eased forward, unlike when Naruto shoved it hard against its hinges. Everyone’s eyes — this time, including Okamoto’s gang — turned to the woman who entered.
Because it was a woman.
A beautiful one. Gorgeous, you could even say. Her blue eyes were the color of glacial melt. Makeup turned her upper eyelids a mellow pink that matched her moderately brighter lipstick. Her lips seemed to pop off her face, incalculably kissable. Her teal and pink robes were flowing, definitely made of silk, and spotless. She was wearing a warm coat over it fashioned from the pelt of a tremendous bear. To buy that in this country would cost more than Ogawa Village could afford if they all pooled their money.
No one left their table to approach this woman. She was such a perfect client that, for the moment, those waiting for work were frozen by the thought that this was too good to be true.
All except one.
“Princess Gale!” Naruto hissed, grabbing Hinata’s hand. “That’s her— I mean, it’s Yukie Fujikaze, the actress who plays her! Oh my god, I might get an autograph. I think she’s coming this way. Am I imagining that?”
Yukie Fujikaze was indeed walking through the inn, going directly for their table. She was wearing cloth slippers that were usually reserved for the wives of daimyos and similarly rich women. She was followed by a grey haired man with a matching beard and a Katana sashed to his hip. Yukie kept her head straight as if she was the only one in the room, but the man behind her couldn’t keep himself from looking at the hard-faced people surrounding them.
“Miss Yukie, I’m not sure we should be in this place,” he said.
“Are we not here to hire help, Sandayu?”
“We are,” the man said. “However, these people…”
“We were told that this is where those looking for work would be.” Yukie’s eyes fell on Naruto’s table. She stopped right in front of it. “See? We have found the perfect applicant.”
“Ohmygosh hi!” Naruto said. He cleared his throat a second later, feeling Kyu’s building anger at how unbecoming he was acting. “I mean, hey. Can we help you with something?”
“Are you looking for work?” Yukie asked.
“We sure are!” Naruto said. Hinata nodded her head a second later. Throughout the meal, her hood had slid back, enough that you could see her face without bending down.
“Presume it will take two weeks of work. There is no danger involved. How much would that cost me?”
“Not that much,” Naruto promised. He held himself back from saying he’d do it for an autograph alone. It wasn’t just him who’d go hungry if his wallet ended up empty now. “I’m sure you could afford it. We’re not expensive—”
A shadow fell over him. Yukie lifted her eyes to look at something above Naruto, while he tilted his head back. He found himself staring at a bearded chin from below.
Okamoto wore his old Iwa headband around his bicep. It was a mark to show that he came from the big leagues, not any third-rate minor village. That was enough to make him the boss in a small, moderately-remote nest like Ogawa Village.
“Move, kid. Let the adults have a conversation,” he said.
He pushed Naruto’s chair out of the way and stepped toward Yukie, whose face didn’t change. Sandayu behind her grabbed the hilt of his sword. Okamoto didn’t even look at the old samurai.
“Trust me, you don’t want brats tagging along after you,” Okamoto said. “The name’s Okamoto. I’m the best shinobi this village has ever seen, and I’m not bad as a man to boot. I’ll take on whatever job you’re offering. If you keep me happy enough, I might not even ask for money.
“Impossible,” Yukie said. “You cannot do what I need.”
“Don’t say that until you’ve given me a try.”
Okamoto reached to touch a tendril of black hair hanging over Yukie’s cheek. Sandayu started to draw his sword. “You bastard!”
Okamoto disappeared.
More exactly, Naruto had tackled him. The two of them were carried into the middle of the room. By chance, Okamoto’s back slammed through the table where he’d been playing poker.
Atop the wreckage of the table, Naruto punched Okamoto. The floor broke as the missing-nin was driven into a newly-formed hole. The entire inn shook slightly. Naruto hit him three more times, growling, looking like a small animal mauling a much larger one. Each time Naruto hit him, Okamoto’s head disappeared deeper under the floorboards and his legs stuck up higher in the air. Occasional twitches confirmed that he was still alive. The man was, at least, durable.
Naruto disappeared from on top of Okamoto. He returned to his seat so fast that it looked like he teleported. Sandayu had let go of his Katana handle, his eyes wide and his mouth fixed open. Similar expressions were sported by missing-nin around the room, who were silently thanking Kami that they hadn’t chosen to pick a fight with the newcomers. “So, what do you need us to do?” Naruto asked. “Guard duty? Stunt double work? Maybe tracking down a lost pet? I’ve got a great nose.”
Yukie’s was the only face that hadn’t changed throughout the chaos. She merely inclined her head.
“Not both of you. Her,” Yukie said.
She prodded the edge of Hinata’s hood, making it slide back. Hinata was too surprised to replace it.
“Me?” Hinata asked. “B-But I’m not half the ninja that Naruto is—”
“We do not need a shinobi,” Yukie said. “Sandayu already hired a team to escort us. However, one of the actresses has pulled out late. I refuse to sacrifice the whole production because of her.”
“S-Surely there are other actual actresses out there…” Hinata said.
Naruto nudged her leg under the table, pleading with his eyes for her not to blow this. Luckily, Yukie had no interest in letting Hinata go.
“Doe-like eyes!” Yukie pointed at Hinata’s face, which made Hinata flinch. “A pleasant, soft voice! An enthralling figure, and above all a natural aura of innocence! I know a woman who can capture an audience’s hearts when I see one. I would, since I’m one myself.”
“Yeah, Hinata! You’ve got this!” Naruto cheered his companion on. “So please let’s take this job.”
“I don’t know…” Hinata said.
“Then perhaps the wage will change your mind.”
Yukie dropped a bag on the table. It turned sideways under its own weight and spilled ryō across the table. Hinata’s eyes were wide as she counted the coins. It was ten times more than Gaara had given them.
“I’ll do my best,” Hinata said quietly.
The newly-formed group of four left the inn minutes later. It hadn’t been wise of Yukie to show off that much money in a room full of missing-nin. But with Okamoto occupying a hole in the floor, no one stopped them. Naruto covertly slid the waiter a portion of the money Hinata had been paid to cover the damages.
Yukie was taking them to the edge of town where her group was waiting. Sandayu said that they had over fifty samurai with them, possibly as a means of intimidating Naruto. It hadn’t worked, if that was what he had in mind. Naruto was still giggling and sighing happily from time to time that his favorite celebrity hired him.
Well, she hired Hinata, but Naruto got to tag along. He’d take it.
As they walked, Hinata started to act nervous. Naruto thought she was getting cold feet about having to go in front of a camera, until she spoke.
“Naruto, Yukie Fujikaze is from the Land of Fire.”
“She’s not from the Land of Fire, actually. She immigrated when she was a little girl. They tell the story in the credits of Princess Gale and the Neverending Storm.”
Hinata didn’t look calmed by this tidbit.
“B-But she’s active in the Land of Fire.”
“Oh, yeah. That’s true.”
“Then if she has shinobi with her… Won’t they be from K-Konoha?”
“I guess they would be,” Naruto said, not sounding bothered.
Hinata looked worried. “But—”
“I don’t know if I can allay your fears, but the shinobi leading them is trustworthy,” Yukie said. “He saved me once when I was young. If I’ve hired you, he won’t interfere.”
“See? It’ll be fine,” Naruto said. “Yukie’s vouching for us. Do you know how big Konoha is? Chances are, they’ll be strangers we’ve never met.”
“Do you forget that you’re a wanted criminal and she’s a Hyuuga that can be recognized on sight?” Kyu asked.
“For how much we got paid, It’ll work out.”
This did put a stop to Kyu’s complaints who had, for a very long time, been nagging Naruto about actually taking a job. Naruto didn’t expect him and Hinata not to be recognized. At the end of the day, what were a few chuunin going to do? Hinata could hold her own for long enough for Naruto to wipe them out, if worst came to worst. If Yukie was right about the one who saved her, it might not even even become a fight.
Naruto had just psyched himself up that his plan was foolproof by the time Hinata stopped walking.
She froze like every tendon in her body turned to ice. Her Byakugan surged to life, seemingly without any conscious thought. Naruto followed where she was looking.
In front of Yukie’s camp were three ninja wearing Konoha headbands. The girl had brown hair pinned in two buns. One of the men was in all green with a bowl cut and eyebrows thick enough you’d need a wind jutsu to shave them.
Last, between the other two, was a man that was almost Hinata’s spitting image. He had the same long hair, only one shade darker. His eyes lacked pupils. When he looked at Hinata, the veins bulged, activating his own Byakugan.
“N-Neji?” Hinata said.
Neji charged.
Comments
Catherine Colin
Does Naruto know the Sexy Jutsu? If so maybe Naruko can be in the movie?
Knight Revan
That punching scene was straight out of kung fu hustle
Jane
Wasn’t expecting Neji so soon! What an interesting surprise. Looking forward to that confrontation. If Hinata is being cast in Icha Icha and Hiashi finds out I will die laughing 🙏.
