Drewells976
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Chapter 239 - Survival
🕑 Added 2024-05-28 01:11:14 +0000 UTChttps://www.patreon.com/file?h=105064998&i=19096508
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While the ivory stone was familiar, everything else wasn’t. Instead of narrow tunnels and buried chambers, the vast halls of the temple were spotless, almost sterile. Flowing scripts circled the walls and floor in golden tapestries splintered by inky runes.
Kai strode across the eerie chambers, careful not to brush the enchantments, his boots echoing through the colossal architecture. Aside from the lack of people, the place hardly looked abandoned—definitely not for eight thousand years.
The dense mana saturating the air made his body tingle. Each breath was reminiscent of the suffocating humidity of Greenside, and just as unpleasant. It took a conscious effort to not heave, drawing in more air would only worsen the symptoms.
The last time he had experienced anything similar was during his arrival at Virya’s estate. Even then, the mana gradient hadn’t been quite as extreme. Once he adapted to the new conditions, he would replenish his reserves much faster.
~The promised exit is on the second left. Don’t touch anything or wander around. Those treacherous cretins have made the wards unstable with their tampering.~ The fairy shrilled with condescension in his head.
“I know.” Kai scowled at the god, keeping to the indicated path. He couldn’t fathom how the enchantments still functioned after all this time, but he wasn’t eager to test them. The currents of mana flowing through the runes were enough to obliterate him several times over.
The temple must be a dangerous site, he was eager to reach a safe place and gather his thoughts. As long as he paid attention to Hallowed Intuition's warnings, he shouldn’t have any problems avoiding danger outside. Then it was only a matter of time till he found a way to escape. If the worst case happened, he could use one of his three wishes.
Hmm, why is it so damn cold?
Contrary to the abundant mana, the temperature lingered around freezing point when Zervathi opened a breach in his prison. Tales spoke of hidden realms presenting all kinds of crazy environments, some in defiance of logic and natural laws. Hopefully, he hadn’t gotten stranded in a frozen wasteland, that would make for a very unpleasant stay.
~Turn right into the Hall of Abnegation, remain on the left and continue for sixty-six strides to the Supplicants’ Steps. You’ll be safely delivered to your destination as promised.~ The godly navigator informed him. ~Now I shall take my leave. You may call upon my name when you’re ready to beg for my aid. My realm has been left in serious disrepair since my imprisonment. To think I have to waste my time on you when there is so much work to be done.~
“Uh… Then why are you still talking?”
Kai noticed the connection snap shut. Praise the spirits. I thought he would never leave.
Having regained the privacy of his mind, he strolled through the last stretch. Glyphs and runes etched with gold covered both sides of the Hall of Abnegation, but his desire for safety beat any lingering curiosity. He descended a set of ivory steps two at a time, and only realized he had crossed the boundary when the enchantment closed behind him.
Chilly gusts and blinding light welcomed him out of the hazardous temple. Boots crunched on fresh snow. One hand rose to shield his eyes while the other wrapped around his torso for warmth.
Please, anything but a frozen wasteland.
Kai squinted, transfixed at the foreign scenery. A pale sun drifted on the horizon, its edges melted onto the dark sky as if a painter had splashed water onto a fresh picture.
Or a god has abandoned his realm for a few millennia…
For the first time, he actually considered whether he might have bitten off more than he could chew. The dying light didn’t offer any warmth. Zervathi’s temple was halfway up a mountain. It was hard to judge its size when he was standing on top of it and clouds shrouded the peak.
I’m not on a glacier. So there is that…
Kai rubbed his hands together, his breath fogged over his fingers. The sooner he found a warmer place, the better. Looking down the white slopes, panic wrenched his guts.
Wait… Is that…? That explains how they built the sites.
Snow continued for a few hundred meters of steep incline until the slope uncovered ivory rocks and a forest further below.
It must be where the Vastaire had mined the stone for their buildings. There was no trace of a quarry throughout the Baquaire Archipelago. His dad thought they had used some kind of arcane magic to create it, or transported it across the ocean. The answer was less magical—or more, depending on the perspective.
I still need to get down.
The entrance to the temple was carved into the mountain face, but the cliff prevented him from circling the structure. Unless he wanted to climb down, a snow-covered field was the only viable option to descend. The spooky temple wasn’t so bad after all, it could offer him shelter till he figured out what to do.
Reminded of his vow of caution, Kai threw a handful of snow on the ivory steps. The ball sizzled into a thin fog. He couldn’t go back, the temple gate was impenetrable from outside.
It must be how the temple managed to look so pristine. Guess that’s a no—
Hallowed Intuition tore through his thoughts. Kai threw himself onto the ground as a roar shook the mountainside, bearing down with an overwhelming presence. He caught a swirl of wings stirring the clouds before an icy flash illuminated the bodies of two massive monsters.
The fight ended just as quickly as it started: golden ichor rained from the clouds with a scaled wing of the same color. After another thundering roar, the aura retracted, letting Kai breathe again. That was far beyond the basilisk or any other beast he had encountered.
A chorus of growls and screeches rose from beyond the cliffside. Kai stole a glimpse of majestic eagles and wyrmlings diving on the remains when furious whispers of danger drowned his thoughts again. The snowy peak shook and collapsed into an avalanche. He could only cast a shield and let the snow swallow him.
*
I need to get out.
Kai crouched in the hollow of a rotting tree, unsure how long he had stayed there. Hungry, cold and tired. Sleep wasn’t an option, a yellow predator could stumble on his shelter at any moment. He needed to be awake to parse mortal danger from the jumble of whispers.
How could I have been so stupid?
He couldn’t tell if it was the fear of being eaten alive or his willpower that kept him together, albeit barely. Since his supplies had run out, he had been surviving on the wild plants he managed to scavenge. The murmurs and Herbology stirred him away from deadly weeds, but they were less accurate with those that merely made him cramp or bleed from his eyes.
Kai had headed into the forest because of the lower mana density, expecting it would be easier to hunt for food, but battles attracted attention, and fresh blood doubly so. He was forced to abandon half the prey he killed or flee with the parts he managed to hack off and stash in his ring.
Even when successful, he had no way to cook them. The last time he had been foolish enough to light a fire, he was forced to use Dora’s elixirs to escape. Flames meant attention and attention meant death—another hard lesson learned.
He had to work with the elements he had. Frozen meat was easier to break and swallow without tasting it. He needed to gather more food before he grew too weak, but his legs refused to move. The wound from the last hunt pulsed painfully on his side. An instant too late, and a drake would have munched on him.
I’m already weak… I’ll be too slow…
If he lay here, there would be no more pain. He could eat a nightmare berry and be done with it. Though at that point, he might as well use one of Zervathi’s requests for a decent meal and a few days in a safe shelter. He might find the will to give this another try if he rested.
Stop being an idiot and get up. You’re not going to die in a stinking hole.
A stubborn spark of pride tugged at him, Kai was sure he had strangled the remaining vestiges a month ago. One wish had gone towards finding a way out of there, and another was reserved to make that plan succeed. That left a single request of wiggle room. If he wasted that now, he might as well doom himself.
“How else am I supposed to survive?” Kai whispered into the darkness of his rotting shelter. He needed to rest, to sleep for longer than an hour. “Is that too much to ask?”
Yes, stop whining and get up. Any wish will just delay our escape.
“Why must you be such a jerk…?”
Zervathi would need seven years to regain the necessary power to send him back on his own—basically a death sentence. The current plan lowered the timetable down to two or three years, given that he managed to fulfill all the requirements. He had no idea how he was supposed to cross the island when he struggled to survive in one place.
You can worry about that later. You need to get food. Get. Up. Now.
“Fine.” Kai crawled out of the trunk to face the verdant jungle. If he had to die, he might as well do it while standing.
*
Slicing the meat into finer morsels, Kai pushed the bowl along the stone floor of his cave. “Is that good enough for Your Majesty?”
“Mew.” The picky kitten appraised the dish with a critical eye. Then his stomach got the better of him, and Hobbes threw himself on the meal with a voracious appetite.
At this rate, I’ll have to roast your meat next.
He had cut his food once on a whim, and now the pest refused to eat it otherwise. It was a mystery how a cat could eat so much while staying so small. After regaining a healthy size, the kitten had barely changed.
Hobbes pushed the empty bowl back with his little paw. His violet eyes nailed him with a pleading look. “Meow.”
“You spoiled little brat.” Kai got down to more slicing. Feeding another mouth forced him to go out more often, though it was a small price for his sanity. Last night the kitten had even slipped into his bed to snuggle with him. “Hmm… What species are you?”
While he had only explored the area between the slopes of the Spike and the western forest, the kitten was the first beast with a Space affinity he had encountered. It was also the first that didn’t try to run away or eat him. “Where are your parents? How could they abandon such a cute face? Did you get lost?”
Hobbes tilted his head, confused why the meal was getting delayed. He was already so slippery that Kai couldn’t understand how an adult cat could have died.
“Well, just enjoy this while it lasts. I need to leave soon, but you can follow.”
“Mrow?”
“I have to. I’ve already stayed too long. I also have a family I want to go back to.”
Technically, he could stay put for seven years. Though the longer he remained in the Sanctuary, the higher the chances of something going wrong. Despite having gotten better at surviving, he needed to run into the wrong yellow beast only once to be done in.
“Do you have any idea where I can find an Astral Harmonizer, a stable Gateway and a manual on ancient elven runes that I can read?”
“Meeew,” Hobbes squeaked impatiently.
“Hmmm… I thought so.” Kai gave him the refilled bowl and took out the map. “I mean, they’re at one of these sites. The question is which one should I pick?”
Zervathi provided an outline of the island as part of his first wish. The problem was that there were too many potential locations marked, three for the astral trinket, six for the gate, and two dozen where he might glean the Vastaire style of enchanting.
Some of these places were probably inside death zones, infested with beasts, or had wards that could crush his body and shred his soul.
I should have asked for more information.
He could exclude the sites on the Spike. It was already a miracle—or his Favor—that he hadn’t gotten killed on the first day. Climbing the mountain would leave him exposed to aerial attacks, not to mention the monsters that nested on top.
“Uh, that still leaves too many options. I can learn about the runes in every place where I can find the other components. So, I can exclude those too, which leaves seven possibilities…” Kai squinted at the map, hoping to glean some information he was missing.
Apart from the areas he had filled out around the forest, there were few landmarks noted. “Do you think this is some kind of pit?” He pointed to three ominous lines on the other side of the island.
Hobbes was too busy licking his bowl to share his genius.
“It must be a pretty large hole to have been marked… or maybe a lake?” The area contained all the pieces he needed, but the journey alone would be risky and long. “Better if I check closer places first…”
There remained a single place with an astral trinket, an isle close to the shore beyond the forest. “Guess I’m going there…”
Diving into the sea wasn’t ideal, but then again there were no good options, just the least bad ones. Perhaps there was some kind of low tide he could use. The swim didn’t look too long anyway and Water was his strongest affinity.
Comments
ManguKing
I'm wondering which gods did this
saltyApple
Reread while waiting for today's chapter. So is this flashback with reference to a convo Kai is having with Ele about how he survived/got out? It was just kind of abrupt transition but now im realizing Kai is probably confiding more in his older sis and reminiscing on the past 2 years.
Connor Hinrichs
Thanks for the chapter. I'm a little disappointed that this chapter was purely flashback, but I thought the pacing was handled really well with the time skips showing his struggles and progress in each new section well
Craig
Yeah, I am super biased against flashbacks too. Honestly, we could have totally skipped every single flashback so far and I would be happy at meeting up with Kai after he gets out of the portal, but I suspect that the author already did a lot of planning/writing about the hidden realm and wants to use it. So if the author insists on using the hidden realm content, then he might as well put it at the beginning of the book so it is not actually a flashback.
Mark
I very much agree, but also have to admit that I am biased in that I absolutely hate flashbacks as a stylistic device in writing (or actually any kind of nonlinear storytelling). That's why I was so happy when Kai just emerged from the portal without any lenghty retelling of of his time there (time skips are fine, they go in the right direction ;‐). I hope we don't get half a book of flashbacks now.
Gabriel Medeiros
Keep on trucking Drew. We are here talking about your work - positively or negatively - because we care about it and are invested in it. I also think that the frustrated folks are just venting in their own way.
Gabriel Medeiros
The last chapter ends with a prompt from Ele asking about how Kai's time in the hidden realm was. The recap was prompted. Now you are entitled to your opinion as are we all, but this recap didn't come out of thin air.
Gabriel Medeiros
We are being introduced to a character that's going to stay a while. A good author needs to explain how the two characters bonded so that any future interaction is validated. I'm not a cat person either but try to see it in that context. I also hope the broader problems Kai faces with the Merian republic will get addressed in due time.
IgnisPrimus
Sure thing Mr "You can’t please anyone these days". And when have I shown anger towards you? annoyance? Sure. But saying I have an "absurd amount of anger" towards you is a weird take and a bit tone-deaf.
IgnisPrimus
Even though joining a discord is not paywalling is still a wall and something the author gets something out of if I do join, And yeah even though quite a few people agree that it is very bad pacing at best and stalling to get money at worst. it is still objective. So can admit I am wrong and that I jumped the gun a bit too hard on that.
Adunn
Just woke up and saw all these replies. You can take it as condescending if you want but I hadn’t even seen your comment before this morning. This is kind of an absurd amount of anger to have towards anyone. Especially considering that this is a story someone is writing online and you chose to support them. Have a good day if that’s something you want to chose to do.
Craig
I dont think these flashbacks work for the story (as flashbacks). For me personally, it would have worked better if we just got these "stuck in the hidden realm" chapters at the beginning, and then he escapes and we continue the main story/his reunion with his Flynn and his family.
IgnisPrimus
I can see that yeah.
Flusspferd
Fair enough. I also just re-read that and finally saw that he wrote “anyone”, not “everyone” as I thought. Which changes my perception of the comment rather drastically, if that makes sense.
IgnisPrimus
"You can’t please anyone these days" In my mind is a very condescending sentence. If he truly was not trying to be a douche I will of course apologize and delete my comment. But I don't think that is the case.
Flusspferd
Having the information on discord is hardly paywalling. The service is free and as far as I know the author doesn‘t benefit from people joining there. Whether he is stalling or not is admittedly up for debate. That being said expecting an author to write exactly the story you (and a lot of others, me at least partially included, I like to see the numbers go up as much as anyone) is mad to me. We are paying for the privilege to see advanced chapters, which we are getting. Not to shape the story to our preferred narrative. It is of course a balance, the author needs people to pay his bills, but it is ultimately still his story. And using cliffhangers or suspense is just what is done in literally every book or tv series to get people to buy the next instalment. Frankly, if he nailed the execution of those flash-backs (and he messed them up pretty badly from my point of view), I believe a lot less people would be complaining.
Flusspferd
Have to agree with IgnisPrimus on that one. While I have seen some toxic comment sections on Patreon, this here is rather mild and certainly not vicious. Is it supportive? Obviously not. Do I personally wish people had some more faith in an author for whose work they are willing to pay a monthly fee just to get earlier access? Certainly. But you can‘t expect upset people keep everything toddler safe…
Flusspferd
I get the annoyance, but that hardly justifies jumping down that guys throat. He is just as free to voice his approval as others are to complain… it‘s not like he attacked others or invalidated their frustration, he simply stated that a) he is fine with the current trajectory of the story and b) that no matter where Drewells takes the story there will always be people who would have liked another direction better. This chapter is admittedly especially controversial and I have my fair share of problems with it, but still… That being said if he believes his approval invalidates all the grievances expressed by others he is clearly delusional, but I can’t find any indication of that.
James Faulkner
Tftc!
Joko
I like the chapter but that might be my cat person bias but it feels kinda out of place
Gabriel Medeiros
The last chapter ended with Ele asking about Kais experiences... so this chapter bookends that nicely.
Gabriel Medeiros
Folks, its a perfectly fine chapter. The issue of serial updates is that the story isnt always moving in the direction we expect, and having to wait for the update when it does can be frustrating. If we were binge reading lots of chapters on rr people would not be complaining like this
George
knowing the end result really undermines any stakes for me
George
I don't see why we didn't just get this at 233 instead of skipping
IgnisPrimus
Damn. You like them? I guess all the criticism and complaints people have does not matter now huh? let me personally apologize on behalf of the heathens who dared to complain about something you like!
IgnisPrimus
Is it not? I either have to pay or join a discord. Making people either pay 20 dollars to get the information you want or wait (for all we know is weeks away from being revealed) or join a group is a scummy tactic to get people to join his discord (something he benefits from) And quite a few people agree that they feel like the author is stalling, just look at the comments on this chapter alone. You also have to factor in the fact that people have to resubscribe to get the answer they want because the author is stalling. It is very scummy behavior and tactics.
IgnisPrimus
If you seriously think people writing mild curse words are people being "vicious" you need to grow tf up. it is totally fair to say it is childish, but to outright say "it feels like the complaints are expressed as viciously as possible " is almost laughable.
Oliver
Clearly it's been awhile since you've met an adult cat person, the toxoplasmosis has taken him...
Seiryus
Tftc. I think you have weave these flashbacks better into the current events. I mean, if we can afford to skip two years of his life, it means that not everything that happened there is important. We've already got the scene explaining the cat, and also scenes showing that he almost starved to death, so the only important info this chapter brings is how he used his wishes? Maybe just focus the next flashbacks on when he got to yellow, whatever happened to his profession, the moment of escape and the moments he gets anything that will be relevant later, otherwise you might as well have written the whole thing.
MAS
I like the cat, but I feel it should be referenced rarely if ever. Kai’s problems are far-reaching and involve the entire realm, and it’s been nothing but cat cat cat. I don’t understand. Mentally Kai is in his early 30s now. Some of his inner dialogue reads like he is in grammar school.
Larc
First of all, the story has been fantastic post time-skip. What works exceptionally well is Kai's reintegration with his family in conjunction with the flashbacks. This tells us three things: what is happening now, what happened in the past, and how does this affect Kai and the people surrounding him. On the other hand, a pure flashback like this feels more like an exposition dump. It doesn't tell us much other than "bad things happened, kai was desperate, hobbes helped" which doesn't add anything new. Still, plenty of chances to rectify this for official publishing.
Jaishel
I liked this
Adunn
You can’t please anyone these days. I like these chapters.
SkyGold
I'm honestly continually shocked at the toxicity I see in this webnovel's patreon comments, it feels like every small valid complaint is expressed as viciously as possible (not yours, just commiserating). I honestly hope Drewells doesn't read these, because they sap my joy and I'm not even the author!
Lenora
I understand the frustrations, but don’t let these comments get to you Drewells. You’re trying something new with the story and that’s okay. The disjointed nature of these chapters definitely needs some work before you publish the ebooks (some reordering at the very least, maybe some rewrites too). Even better if you can do some of the reshuffling before it gets to royalroad. Your writing is great, a little extra organizing will go a long way.
Flusspferd
I know… but from my understanding it was posted for yellow patrons by one of the top tier supporters as a courtesy rather than by design. Not that that changes the end result by any means…
Steven Thompsen
Thanks for the chapter!! so originally with the time skip you were saying you're going to have flashbacks so I expected one flashback every like three chapters or something maybe even a little more than that but it seems to be the chapters are more flashback than actual chapters and if that's the case I don't understand why you did a time skip in the first place. Just my opinion on the matter
BaguaBrady
We have his status on the discord as yellow patrons tho (without profession stats that are currently secret for plot reasons). So even that complaint is off base
Flusspferd
@BaguaBrady: what I believe IgnisPrimus meant to say is that while the top tier doesn‘t get extra chapters, they did get access to his updated status, which is what many readers are waiting for. Why he doesn‘t just say that and instead resorts to insults though, is anyone’s guess…
BaguaBrady
Troll
Flusspferd
I don‘t think the premise was so bad. Telling some of his story from the hidden realm to Ele, his usual confidant when it comes to his status, progress and also the hardships of his training, seems reasonable to me. However, I do agree that the author messed up the execution of it for once (given the overall quality of the story, for once is the choice of words I would go with, but that makes this chapter even more jarring). It lacks interaction with / reactions from Ele and I am also quite unsure about the scenes that were picked and the thought process behind them. I personally don‘t care whether we get the status this or next month, keeping the suspense for next month to entice patrons to stay is just good business sense. That presumes that the story makes sense and flows similarly well as usual of course. Needless filler to reach next month is decidedly less acceptable.
IgnisPrimus
This whole chapter is stalling and the author is paywalling shit. tf are you on about? Why are you being stupid on purpose?
Flusspferd
I have to agree, this didn‘t feel like a flashback at all. I expected some interaction with Ele, but I will just see how it is resolved in the next couple of chapters.
BaguaBrady
There is no stalling going on, what are you even on about? And the $23 tier doesn't get any extra chapters. Your whole complaint is absolutely off base
IgnisPrimus
The stalling has gone too far man, even though I normally love filler chapters. This is the most unfun, unimportant, and some of the most useless chapters in a long while. I rarely get frustrated by authors stalling in stories but I can already feel this is getting to me. There is just no point in it. And the scummy behavior of paywalling what we are waiting for behind a 23-dollar membership is just a fucked up thing to do. I get wanting to reward people who support you more than the standard but "punishing" people that is paying less while doing it is not okay.
Bosparan
Thanks for the chapter :)
Draeysine
I went back and read the end of the previous chapter. idk. I feel like this transition works in a book, just not in a serial. Its still off. Bumpy. Personally i think, commentary in between flashback cuts works well to make sure the reader didn't just get lost, and isn't weird for the book version either. There's a way to do this without making it odd for serial readers, even if there is technically some indication of flashback happening at the end of the previous chapter, its not smooth. I guess thats fine if the goal wasn't for it to be smooth
Luboš Hemala
I thought it took that long because he specifically didn't use Zervathi's wishes. I mean, it could be very strong plot device much later on, to waste it here is stange. I mean, chatting with him doesn't cost Zervathi much, no? Apart from that, the chapter is okay, nice even to see him struggle, but the conclusion that he he needed an out is a bit weak.
Flusspferd
I think we are all happy not to be held hostage for months in the realm, but I do agree with Ben Enz and Halfcrzy that the flashbacks don‘t really work like this. Given the ending of this chapter, at least today’s, maybe the others this week need to be flashbacks as well for them to make any kind of sense in the context of the conversation Kai was having with Ele. But at that point we had way more flashbacks than regular storyline since the beginning of book 4 and we might as well have gotten an abbreviated version of a chronologically sound stay in the realm. That is not to say that I dislike the chapters as they are or the flashback idea in general, they are just too close to each other with too little present storyline in between, as some of the others already stated.
Draeysine
Chapter seems off. like Its weird from the previous chapter. A bit of lead in to a flashback would have been smother transition. this is just hard cut into hard cut. Like how is this presented in the current story? is Kai talking about this to someone? Is he telling this story? is there anything being left out? Is this instead a dream? This is so disjointed.
PloofDoodle
Where's the connection to the end of the last chapter? this feels disconnected from the rest in a weird way. Its not him having a flashback like the previous instances and its not him explaining his time in the realm of anything. I feel like this needs another pass rhrough editing to make it fit better.
FrozenSharkey
Recommend looking at my Edit suggestion comments on 231, 232, 233 for a better structure to recommend changes, makes it easier to tell what needs changing
wanderer117
For the first time, he considered whether he might have bitten more than he could chew. suggested edit For the first time, he considered whether he might have bitten off more than he could chew. Snow continued for a few hundred meters of steep incline, leaving then space to ivory rocks and a forest further blow. suggested edit Snow continued for a few hundred meters of steep incline, then the slope changed to ivory rocks with a forest further blow. He couldn’t tell if it was fear of getting eaten alive or willpower that kept him together, albeit barely. suggested edit He couldn’t tell if it was fear of getting eaten alive or willpower that kept him awake, albeit barely. The murmurs and Herbology stirred him away from deadly herbs, but they were less accurate with those that just made him cramp and bleed for days. suggested edit The murmurs of Hallowed Intuition and Herbology stirred him away from deadly herbs, but they were less accurate with those that just made him cramp and bleed for days. or The murmurs of Herbology stirred him away from deadly herbs, but they were less accurate with those that just made him cramp and bleed for days. An instant too late, and a drake would have munched on him. suggested edit An instant's delay, and a drake would have munched on him. If he wasted that now, he might as well doom himself. suggested edit If he wasted that now, he might doom himself. Where are even your parents? suggested edit Where are your parents? “Well, just enjoy this while it lasts. I need to leave soon and you can follow.” suggested edit “Well, just enjoy this while it lasts. I need to leave soon and you can't follow.” Though the longer he remained in the Sanctuary, the higher the chances something went wrong. suggested edit Though the longer he remained in the Sanctuary, the higher the chances something would go wrong. Despite having gotten better at surviving, he needed to run into the wrong yellow beast in a moment of distraction only once to be done in. suggested edit Despite having gotten better at surviving, he only needed to run into the wrong yellow beast once. Any moment of distraction could be fatal.
Wolve
TFTC
Ben Enz
I think halfcrzy was saying to build more suspense by not out right saying what happened, and instead slowly give hints as to what happened in the hidden realm, basically what you said just over a longer period that what is currently being done.
A B
living on with the wild plants -> living on the wild plants
George R
Thanks for the chapter
Oliver
I prefer my telling of tales of disbelief in the form of modest mouse dashboard music video...
Rylie Harris
tftc! I do agree with halfcrzy tho, I think mixing it in over time with more current events could add more context and chances to integrate his past into his behaviors now each chapter.
Hectorbeserk
You could make the flashbacks more intresting by having some banter between kai and ele you could even use it to set up foreshadowing and kai using hind sight for som intersting commentary and introduce some tension kinda like the water thing
Alex
Anything can be presented as a vacation if properly staged. This chapter was not staged and appears very disjointed after Kai’s reunion. It could be a story to his little brother of how much his cat eats or something along the lines of of Kai reminiscing… but just as a chapter it interferes with the flow of the story
Memoryofgold
Thank you for the chapter! I hope to see Kai apply his survival skills and wit in future conflicts, and maybe reflect on what he could've done better in the past
Silver Beard
This chapter sucked balls. Sorry. Somebody has to say it. Author knows were waiting for status update; and we get this crap? A reflection out of time or prompt? Just pushing out the reveal until the 1st obviously. Very shallow dude... very
Nathan Sto
Each to their own, but I like this. The story can be told in different places of his journey and only show what's relevant to the events of the current timeline. Plus, I don't know if I would have liked being stuck in the realm for the next sixty chapters.
Emily Gurnavage
Dang, he had quite the quest in front of him. I had been thinking it was more just a waiting game.
mechanizedbush
Tftc! "leaving then space to ivory rocks and a forest further blow." -> "with ivory rocks and a forest further below."? or maybe just a rewording here. "western forest. The kitten" -> "western forest, the kitten" "Astral Harmozirer" -> "Astral Harmonizer"? Unless that's intentionally a new term
Halfcrzy
I feel you should have kept what happened a mystery longer. Bring it out in pieces. If we're having immediate flashbacks, we should have avoided the time skip and followed Kai to begin with. Plus the audience is eager to see what the new him can do.
Aceluke
Ty for the chap! Seems Kai worked hard to get free
Andrew
Thank you!
Austin
Thanks for the Chapter!
