ncase
patreon
(Patreon Paused For One More Month)
🕑 Added 2021-12-29 17:27:52 +0000 UTCHi all, sorry for the radio silence.
Long story short, I've been in a 2-month-long mental health sinkhole. I don't know what compels me to tell you this, but stupidly enough, it was precipitated by an interaction with a long-time Patron who I trusted & opened up to. I'm vague-posting to not reveal private details. I voluntarily gave that person a lifetime refund (with interest), & blocked them. Still, I feel gross and mistrustful.
To be honest, the interaction wasn't that bad, and it's not really about this one person, as much as my pent-up anger over the last two years over [waves around] everything. This interaction just happened to... eerily summarize... the, frankly, moral and mental rot that's eating almost every institution and public: including my communities, possibly my friends, possibly me.
But after chatting with many friends and a rubber duck, I actually am in a healthier place now. I may write up an article (~30% confidence) about my reflections on the years 2020–2021. I figure many of you may also be dealing with pent-up anger, so, maybe this'll help.
I'll probably un-pause this Patreon (~80% confidence) –– after this 16(!) month burnout-hiatus, which was originally only planned for 6 –– on Feb 1st, 2022, Lunar New Year. Year of the Tiger. I'm gonna pretend that's my new year, my fresh start.
Stay safe during this Nth wave!
~ Nicky
Comments
Zach the Cat
I'm treating this as my new year as well. Best of luck to you and your future.
Lydia Choy
Take care of yourself ❤️
the-alchemist
Nicky! Take all the time you need :)
Duncan Lock
The things you make are great - and I look forward to more - but you are great too - and you are more important. Look after yourself first!
Krakenova
What a butthole! Hope they get a lifetime itchy dandruff problem and might mice eat their privates!!
Emma
Sorry that this has happened to you and please never feel you have to apologise for being off grid for a while! I think it's safe to say most of us support you because we just want you to do you :)
AP
Whenever and whatever you want is fine by me! Glad you're taking care of yourself and others.
Ben Walker
Your stuff is good! I'd love to hear more about the "moral and mental rot that's eating almost every institution and public: including my communities, possibly my friends, possibly me." if you feel up to it. I think that statement triggers some background awareness in myself, hopefully other people too, without entirely knowing what it is. Would be cool to read more about it (or maybe even... play an instructable toy about it)
Poker Chen
When you're ready, Nicky. We miss you, but when you're ready.
Kristin
I second this. I'm happy supporting you and your fantastic work.
Neal McBurnett
As the others are saying, we love you and are sorry some folks are making your life more difficult. I'm happy every time I hear from you, and hope you don't feel pressure from us to be different than you want to be!
Michael Huff
JFC, Nicky I'm so sorry that happened and that really sucks. #1 You're awesome #2 Apparently that person didn't understand what being a "patron" means. We're just here to support whatevs you're doing!
Chris K
I am trying to find help in this: "This too, shall pass". Maybe it makes sense. Also: you are like a comet to me. Comets cannot be demanded. They appear when the time is right and then us good humans are allowed to appreciate them. I appreciate you showing up right now. And in the meantime, I'll wait patiently. As any good human should do.
Emelin Ringuette
I feel offended on your behalf as another long-term patron. Don't worry about pausing for another month, you are super duper more than what you produce. I'll be here!
Brandon Quinn
Hang in there, Nicky! I know you're doing the best you can ♥
Peter Norvig
I'm sorry to hear that Nicky. I want you to know that the work you do is great and I always look forward to hearing about it. I am glad you are taking care of yourself and I look forward to hearing more from you whenever you are ready.
Rev Storm
Yikes, I am so sorry to hear that. Take as much time as you need, your mental health always comes first.
Tim S (Banana Juice Tech)
Oof. Sorry you had to deal with that. There's certainly been plenty to be angry about the past few years. Here's hoping the year of the tiger is a good one
SquidHominid
I'm with everyone else. I don't know what happened, but I can infer some things from what you've said... Keep up the good work, but until then take all the time you need. <3
David E Weekly
[hug] Sorry to be going through this. Your work is amazing; take the time you need. I'm glad you're doing better!
Josh Lewis!
Hang in there, Nicky! I'm sorry to hear people are doing hurtful things, but I'm glad that you're moving forward, feeling a bit better. We'll all get through this whole worldwide mess together.
Nikhil Harithas
Hope you're doing better Nicky!
