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Stumbling Up: A Loser's Guide to Progression - Chapter 29: One of Us
🕑 Added 2025-07-27 18:11:02 +0000 UTC[You have chosen [Dead Wrong] for your [Adventurer] class. [Cheat Death], [Alive, For Once], [Analyze], and [Improvised Damage] have been granted. You will retain [Party], [Stillpoint], [Heartbeat], [Partial Rapport], [Companion], and [Minor Manipulate Slime] as part of your [Adventurer] base class. Legacy skills [Hammer Time], [Nailed It], and [Self Critic] are also available but will no longer progress. Adventure onward.]
No congratulations? The system didn't seem pleased with my choice, but at least I was able to retain a couple of my old skills. I looked at [Self Critic], wishing that wasn't one of them.
I joined the rest of [Your Mom's] party, "So, I'm not one to question luck, but Meredeath..." Green eyes focused on me. My mouth suddenly went dry. "You're dead." Words failed me.
Leo verbally groaned.
Amused, her eyes crinkled along her cat eyeliner. She mimed patting herself down, looked at Tandy, "Do I seem like a zombie? I feel pretty alive."
Tandy frowned, as though seriously examining Meredeath for zombieism, "No, but I'm not going to rule out vampire."
"No, you know what I mean." I could feel my ears burning. "In that last fight against the Dunglord, you sacrificed yourself for Tandy."
And how many times did she die in total?
Oh. Shit. I wanted to crawl under a rock.
Leo saved me, may the Everbear bless his soul.
"It's a good thing you didn't die in the intestines, but what'd got me confused is why didn't you come out with the rest of us?"
"Yeah, what he said." I pointed at Leo. Meredeath's gaze told me just how stupid I sounded.
"Well, when you all left, without me, the Dunglord reset. I had to fight him again while the dungeon fell apart." She said it like it didn't mean anything, that we'd abandoned her in the dungeon, but she wasn't meeting our eyes.
She soloed the boss. She said it with such nonchalance, like it wasn't a big deal. Leo's jaw hung open in astonishment, and his jaw wasn't the only one.
She flipped her hair, dismissing our incredulity. "The hard part about that dungeon was keeping the squishies alive." Meredeath waved towards us.
"What's a squishy?" Leo asked, clueless. I didn't know either, but I knew better than to ask.
Meredeath looked up at my big friend, frowning. "It's a stuffed animal where I'm from, but in context here it just means you're easily killed."
"Poke me in the gut, you'll see how squishy I am," Leo muttered, flexing his abs. They were visible under his t-shirt, cradled by the two sides of Tandy's sweater that he insisted on wearing.
"Are you leaving us then? Now that you're an [Adventurer] in name as well as ability?" Tandy's voice quietly sliced through our banter. Leo and I looked at Meredeath, not having considered that particular outcome.
I really didn't want her to leave. I also wasn't ready to say that out loud.
Meredeath looked at Tandy, Leo, me, and then her eyes hopped to Richard. They stared at each other as though a personal conversation was taking place.
Tandy’s eyes darted from my shoulder to Meredeath and back, concluding the same thing.
"You two going to include us in this discussion?" Tandy did not take kindly to being talked over. She received it in abundance from her grandmother growing up.
Meredeath looked at the rest of us again.
You can trust them.
Leo's eyes widened. "Was that Richard? My little banana peel, why haven't you been talking to us this whole time?"
"Of course it was Richard, you dolt," Tandy said, punching him in the shoulder. "But yeah, same question, Richard."
It's a hidden quality of [Partial Rapport]. I refuse to explain further.
Why would he have hidden this from everyone?
Meredeath, tell them or I will.
"Fine, but let's sit down. It's a long story," said Meredeath as she sank to the ground, legs crossed. She sounded defeated.
We were scraped, singed, bleeding, bruised, and covered in ash. My ankle ached, I was pretty sure I was missing my eyebrows, and I looked like I'd spent the day roasting myself in the oven. We all sat down, as though it was perfectly normal to sit in the crater grave of one of the legendary guardians to have a little chat. Tandy opened her bag and passed out snacks. I brushed off a rock and put Richard down.
Leo handed me my hammer. As my hand wrapped around the shaft, a notification triggered.
[[Guardian's Promise] - Soul Bound - This ordinary hammer has been infused with the magic of the Guardians of the Ursine Wall. It is as though a Guardian always has your back, the hammer carries the gratitude of the Guardian [Your Mom’s Party] freed from corruption. [Guardian’s Promise] is soul bonded with an individual [Cole Thornfield], and all attributes will only work with this individual. The death of [Cole Thornfield] will result in the self-destruction of the [Guardian's Promise]. Abilities: [Target: Dungeon Born] - Grants additional damage against dungeon and dungeon originating monsters, this scales with user abilities and powers. [Guardian] - Grants additional damage when used in defense of [Your Mom's Party] or [Mundane] individuals. [Molten Promise] - Allows the user to alter the hammer head for various purposes. Initial forms are: Hammer, Pick, and Molten.]
[Guardian's Promise] glowed in my hand. Runes like those that had been carved into the arch glowed along the pitted hammer head. It felt good, but I couldn't help but wonder if I'd chosen the wrong class after all. This weapon was meant for a [Hammer Vanguard].
I’d followed my gut about [Dead Wrong]. Time would tell if I was right, but this first puzzle piece was a proverbial gut punch.
I gave the weapon a couple of swings, wondering what the form molten did. The intensity of it glowed brighter, almost with a touch of the corrupt guardian's lightning. Question answered.
I couldn't believe I'd gotten a soul-bound weapon out of the fight. It mirrored Tandy's [Mercurial Scissors]. Grinning, I clipped the hammer to my belt, its light extinguishing instantly.
Its description was missing torch. Who’s the glowworm now?
“I never called you a glowworm,” I hissed. He was salty about something he called himself! Typical fanged banana slug behavior.
"You done, swinging your hammer?" Meredeath had lost her patience. I looked down to find my friends waiting for me. Chagrin, I joined them sitting on an overturned stone covered in ash.
"Sorry, the weapon..." I trailed off, knowing I’d lost focus. "Go ahead." If my face hadn't already gotten burned, it'd be burning.
Meredeath stared at me a moment longer, as though daring me to get distracted. I just nodded and gave her a friendly smile.
"Okay, I'm only going to explain this once. And you're going to have questions that I either can't or won't answer, so pay attention." Each word was begrudgingly given, as though it was our fault we didn't know what'd happened to her.
"You are from another world?" Tandy blurted out.
I laughed. That was wild. What “other world?” I realized no one else was laughing. Cutting myself off, I cleared my throat.
"Sorry, I just... You can't... I mean, another world?" I said the last word with a squeak. Meredeath's thin eyebrow arched as though daring me to make a bigger fool of myself.
"Yeah," Meredeath looked at Tandy, "I'm not sure how you knew. But yeah, I'm from another world. A place called Kansas. My world doesn't have magic, although I think you'd consider a lot of the technology from my world magic, just because you didn't understand how it worked. I'm here, and I received a new quest after the [Trial Dungeon] that I can't avoid. So it plays into this question of whether I go-"
"We'll help." The words were out of my mouth before she finished her question. I said the words, staring right into her green eyes, knowing I'd follow her into hell itself if it would help. The corners of Meredeath’s lips teased a smile, but her eyes flickered to my teammates.
Tandy coughed. Oops.
"I'll help," I said meekly.
"We'll all help, Meredeath. But we do need to know what your new quest is, and what this has to do with you being from another world." Tandy's voice was reassuring, and I flicked my eyes to hers. She smiled at me. I looked at Leo, who was grinning from ear to ear.
"Well, the system granted me an [Adventurer] base class, but errored out giving me a specific class," Meredeath tried to explain. Seeing our confused expressions, she continued, "It gave some sort of computer error message and told me that it didn't have the mana required to grant my non-standard class, and then triggered a quest."
"Can you share the quest with us?" Tandy asked, ever practical.
Meredeath frowned. "It says the quest isn't shareable. Oh wait, here there's an option to share text only."
[Quest Granted: [Find a Sponsor]
Congratulations on passing the [Trial Dungeon] as an [Expeditionary Force]. You have been granted the [Adventurer] base class and have retained your [Adventurer] skills. Since you have not chosen any of the [Adventurer] classes offered, you must now find a sponsor for an appropriate [Adventurer] class. You have [1 month] to complete this task. Failure to do so will result in removal from this realm. Adventure Onward.]
"... the thing is," Meredeath's voice was soft, "it never offered me [Adventurer] classes."
Leo, of all people, was the first to put it together.
"You're one of us!" He reached across and slapped her on the back.
Meredeath looked at him like he was crazy, and I must have seemed equally confused. Leo chuckled at our expressions.
"She's one of us, Cole," his grin widened, "She's broken."
