MrBiffo
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TOP TIER BONUS PODCAST - CRINGING AND AUTHENTICITY
🕑 Added 2022-02-21 13:08:44 +0000 UTC
Back when I was training to be a counsellor, we went on a couple of experiential residential trips. Basically, these were intensive two-day workshops, which would often be very, very full on. It’s fair to say that first one I went to changed my life for the better, and the last one I went to made me realise I no longer wanted to become a therapist.
Throughout them we’d do exercises, and occasionally break off into different experiential groups – these are where you’d basically sit around in a circle with a bunch of other trainees and one of the tutors, where nothing would be on the agenda. They’d last an hour or so, and you’d just come to the room with whatever feelings you were carrying around, and you’d wait for someone to start sharing.
That might sound awful to you. I got a lot out of them. They could be raw and painful. They could be funny and fun. They could descend into catfights. The full gamut of human experience would be there. The point was to learn to be okay with the entirety of who we all are - even the difficult parts - and to shine a light on areas of ourselves we might be less keen to look at.
At one of these, one of the other trainees mentioned that she was constipated. There were a few awkward, embarrassed, laughs, but what it did brilliantly was open up a discussion around the shame many of us feel about our normal bodily functions. We all shit and fart and burp and piss, yet… they’re taboo subjects. More taboo, absurdly, than sex for many people.
We’re often taught at a really young age that these things are dirty and not to be discussed, rather than the completely mundane and ordinary functions that they are. Consequently, we carry that shame and stigma with us into adulthood, and it’s why so many people will gladly laugh at a joke about, say, sexual assault or genocide, while being "disgusted" at a joke about shitting your pants.
It really, really, really pisses me off. It makes me angry that society has made us this way. I like a toilet humour gag more than the average person, perhaps, but only because I’m giggling at the taboo. Some can’t even do that. I’ve got the shame, and Sanja’s got the shame, and it took us a long time to even admit to one another that we sometimes do a poo.
That is so wrong and stupid.
Why do I bring this up now? Well, because in this week’s episode of BYAMPOD, it starts and ends with a bit of fart-talk.
It was just the sort of thing Sanja and I will wind each other up about, and our relationship – being candid and open and, as much as possible, our normal elves – is absolutely key to the podcast for me. It’s not some dry analysis of the albums. I’ve no interest in making that. It’s important to me that it feels human, that you share in our human experience of Marillion's music. It isn't music made solely for people who don't fart.
Because what’s more human than farting? Sorry if that makes you uncomfortable, but perhaps you need to question why, when you’ve probably farted multiple times today already.
Nonetheless, I came very close to editing it out of the episode. It wasn’t a subject I really wanted in what could well be one of our most listened-to episodes, that I knew was going to be heard by Marillion’s manager and – potentially – the band, given we rave about the album. Plus, Sanja was embarrassed… yet not so embarrassed that she demanded I take it out. She knows she can do that if she really had a problem with anything.
However, it’s such an emotional ep… that I felt it needed something that grounded it. Plus, I only return to the topic at the end because I knew it might help reset Sanja - and people listening - after she got very upset during the recording.
It was just us being us. We’re human, warts and all, and, y’know, if people don’t like it then it’s their issue. It’s their shame they’re viewing the world through.
Suffice to say, we’ve already had one person say they couldn’t listen beyond the episode’s intro (see the above image). Which is unfortunate, because they’re missing out on a great review. And it’s fine. I knew it would happen. It’s not the guy’s fault, but I’m also not going to apologise – as much as I am compelled to… because I know that’s just my fart-shame talking.
<CUE BEE-GEES VOICE> “It's just your fart-shame talkin'… You're telling me lies, yeah!”
Anyhow… there are far more reasons why I might be cringing at this week’s episode than the farting, and I discuss them in this little bonus podcast, along with why authenticity is so important to me in Digitiser episodes.
Also: what we’re watching and reading!
Comments
Kathy Holloway (Silph)
(Really had to hold myself back from saying ‘I’m here for Sanja’s bottom’.)
Kathy Holloway (Silph)
Please maintain arse content. I listen to Byampod and still could only recognise one song (Kayleigh obvs) as Marillion. I’m here for the nonsense.
Matt Kimber (Timberwolf)
Home recording is such a joy, isn't it? I can get through an entire day of work with little more than the occasional bird tweeting outside, then the moment I get the microphone out one of those massive army helicopters will fly past, the local ambulance station will dispatch every single ambulance they have past our house, a bunch of motorbikists with silly exhausts will decide our local area is the racetrack du jour, then the police will drive around with sirens for a bit (conspicuously just after the motorcycles have left) and finally once all that's done and everyone in the vicinity has had their fill of operating noisy vehicles and committing crimes the dogs will wake up and go clattering up and down the stairs for a solid 20 minutes.
Kelvin Green
"Dragging the anchor around"; what a great saying! I've never heard that before.
John Veness
We love you Mr and Mrs Biffo, farts and all. Also: normal elves 🥰
Pete Pyjamas
I bet this whole post is just a ruse to warm us up to the idea that your next musical release will be a cover version of “man of a thousand faeces” made entirely from crowdsourced audio clips of your listeners farts. (ok ok – too gross… but just imagine how spectacular the end part of that song would be!) …I haven’t even listened to the ep in question yet….TBH i'll likely be more offended by the fact that you got the album a whole 2 weeks before us mere plebs!
Treacle Truffle
Much like when reading Digitiser and I found video games were incidental to the main event of absurdist humour, the Marillion content in BYAMPOD is kind of secondary to just enjoying hearing two ( and occasionally three) people who's company I enjoy talking about something they enjoy. And yes I now know a heck of a lot about Marillion, and have an appreciation of their music, but it's as a side effect of what draws me to the podcast. The honesty in emotion when discussing how the album connected with you both was electric to listen to and the slight silliness was, to me, a sort of earthing wire to help diffuse and dissipate the emotions. So don't go changing (not that you were) you crazy, and occasionally flatulent, kids
Jeff Thelen
To me, it's just another example of how you, in most all of your creative output, embrace childlike silliness as an adult. It's what hooked me on Digi in the first place.
Paul Rose (Mr Biffo)
Oh, it's what I do though. I love it! It's why I sent two-and-a-half years doing counselling training!
The Amazing Cliff
I think the main point on this is how it's seen as wrong to some that a married couple talking about perfectly normal bodily movements are more frowned upon than some topics that are opening joked about as you listed. I'm not saying anyone is wrong in disliking (entertainment is all perspective) but it's silly humour. I talk to my son about fluffs and being smelly...like a old Beano or Dandy comic...which I'd imagine some who are looking for umbrage would read when they were younger. One or two people do not permit change, so don't look into it to much mate.
Paul Rose (Mr Biffo)
I totally get it's not for everyone, which is why I'm not upset with the guy not wanting to listen beyond that moment in the ep's opening. It's something we actually pulled back from - consciously - a lot on Digi in the last couple of years, for that reason, mind. Also, I kind of felt that we went as far as we could go with all that in Found Footage. I'll be honest though; I don't really think the mention in this week's BYAMPOD can be construed as toilet humour. It's just married couple bantz really.
Eric Johnson
Right, despite the fact I am top tier patron (I think I am), the scat humour is something I sometimes feel uncomfortable with. I would not wish to argue with Pauls point, in fact i think he is probably right. I hope no one interprets "I don't like it" , as "I don't like it and neither should you". I find digitiser videos and podcasts highly amusing,
Paul Rose (Mr Biffo)
Hah! Oh yeah! Oh well. The guy was on our side anyway, so it's not like it matters.
Eric Johnson
Have you accidentally included a name in the last message (despite previously redacting it)? Not that it bothers me.
