MrBiffo
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MISERY BLOG
🕑 Added 2020-12-10 12:28:37 +0000 UTCHello, loves. Thought I'd check in. Today we're filming our Christmas ghost hunt, and I know many of you will be pleased to hear that Eli's going to be joining us for it. No idea what's going to happen, but we're doing it in the dark, so that'll be terrifying.
Truth is, the last few weeks have been a touch challenging, coming on top of a year that has been one long challenge for a lot of us.
I'm fortunate in that I don't tend to get anxiety. If I ever get down, it tends to pass pretty quickly, unless things are really bad. I know how many of you struggle with mental health issues, and I appreciate that I'm one of the fortunate ones. But... everyone has their limit, and the past few weeks have lobbed one brick at us after another, the peak of which was the bombshell last week that my dad has cancer.
We've been told that it'll be a slow-moving thing, and as he's 85 they've said there's every possibility that he'll die from something else. I mean, as silver linings go, I've had better. What is also weighing on me is that my mum is going blind. She's struggling already to do things she could do easily just this time last year, and the worry is what happens to her if my dad isn't around any longer. It's really weighing on me. I hate seeing them this vulnerable and old.
Weirdly, the tipping point was trying to help my mum with her iPad the other day - her most treasured possession - and finding out that no matter how big we make the text, there's no way of improving her rapidly degenerating sight. I dunno. I just feel awful for her, and it kind of makes it worse that my mum puts on a brave face. She must be terrified.
What I feel fortunate about is that I've not been hit so hard that I can't do the things I love. Yesterday, Sanja and I spent about three hours recording podcast stuff, and for those three hours I forgot about everything else. It was lovely. We're doing a Christmas special of that, plus the Supernatural World, Christmas Shop Corner, and the Pant-Oh - this year we're going all out to try and bring a bit of light. But also, I think I need to keep busy.
I've no idea what Christmas is going to be like for our family; thanks to Covid we're unable to see everyone we want to see, and of course there's now going to be something else hanging over us, unspoken but ever-present. But we'll try to make the best of it. I hope you can too.
Paul
Comments
Chris JC
That’s crappy news and I’m extremely sorry to hear it. Lots of love to all x
Kathy Holloway (Silph)
This is all so horrible and frightening, and I wish I could fix it for you. One thing that really frustrates me is the perception from some that because elderly people are old it's fine for illnesses and disabilities and even death to come along. It's not. My dad was 81 when he died in 2014, and I was 31. One otherwise sympathetic and well-meaning woman went 'oh well, that's not so bad' when I told her his age, as if his 'good innings' meant that it was fine. It wasn't fine, he was my dad and he could have been 500 and I still wouldn't have been ok with him dying. I could have hit her. Take care and I wish you all well. xx
WonkyBearhead
Really sorry you've had such bad news, sending you lots of love xx
Tyronne Mann
Sorry to hear about all this Paul - Family is the most important thing of all and everything else is just fluff. Take it easy and spend as much time as you can with your parents as the new memories will be worth their weight in gold.
Hedders
What terrible news. All of everything to you and yours Biffo.
Zobbster
Sending you all my best wishes.
lizithekiwi
Big love to you and your family ❤️ xx
Jason Salisbury
FFS you didn't deserve more shit on top of this total shit year. Condolences to the family. Take it easy for yourself and don't worry too much about Digitiser unless it's fun for you.
Paul
So sorry to hear this Paul. All the best to you and your family. X
WhatHoSnorkers
Sorry to hear that Paul. There's nothing that anyone can say that can make things any better.
Treacle Truffle
Can relate to a lot of what you say about having elderly parents and seeing how old age creeps up on the people that for so much of your life seem unchanging. All my love to you and those you hold close.
John Veness
Oh Paul :( I'm glad to hear that keeping busy is helping you, but, y'know, don't push yourself. Love and hugs to all the Roses.
Dave Graves
The price we pay for love and life, is the hurt and loss it brings us. I always try to tell myself that it's a balance. I have a tendency to freeze out emotions because they can hurt...but, in doing so, I've missed out on so many good times. Thoughts with you and yours Paul.
Kelvin Green
2020 really has been a kick in the bumhole. All the best, Biffster.
Spiff
Lots of hugs to you Paul
