Daniel Newwyn
patreon
[I am a Table] Chapter 38
🕑 Added 2025-03-03 15:17:09 +0000 UTCThat damn robed mage.
From his stationary vantage point, Blorbo felt a weird tingling sweeping over his surface. Something was happening. The cabbages that had been threatening to topple were suddenly steadied, and there was no sound or dramatic flourish that would cause any suspicion. It was a subtle spell, too quiet for anyone to detect, but Blorbo felt it.
So unlike him.
His status updated for a brief moment:
[Magical Furniture]
What?
Then it went back to being [Furniture].
“Daughter of ze old man, my favorite apprentice!” Blorbo could hear his over-enthusiastic voice ring out. “Have you made another breakthrough with your spellcasting?” Then without Lena’s response, he’d already replied to himself. “Incredible! You have made ze wand even smaller! A masterful step backward.”
“I… I haven’t done anything,” Lena stuttered.
“You are slacking! It is a crime against the arcane liquidity to be indolent.”
Blorbo could hear the defensiveness coming from Lena’s inflection. “You told me to remember five spell chants and they’re all super hard to remember! Also, I’m still trying to figure out how to grapple the stick correctly. It’s so small.”
“It is another mistake to be calling your beloved wand ze stick. Learn to hold it properly and I shall teach you more basic wand spells as appropriate as it can be for a banker to cast. A bright student such as yourself should have no problem casting them by tomorrow.”
“Oh yeah… about that… Actually, I need something quicker. Something I can learn now. I’ll be out of town starting tomorrow. I know it’s a bit much to ask, but… it’s something really urgent.”
“Ah! Zat will not do. Whatever could possibly be more urgent than arcane knowledge?”
You already know! You caused it, you bamboozling blunderbuss!
“It’s… something out my control. My family will be on the move at sunrise.”
“Zen…” The mage stopped for a second too long. “Will zis afternoon do?”
“I have to attend temple services this afternoon, but after the 12th hour I can.” For some reason, the 12th hour in this realm would be around 6 PM in Blorbo’s last world. He didn’t know how his knowledge about time in his past life surfaced now. Probably for reader convenience.
Temple?
I’ve never seen you mention it at all, much less go there and pray!
“Yes of course. But beware of ze curse of ze night, Bring along a trusted companion.”
“W-what do you mean ‘the curse of the night’?” She asked. But Blorbo no longer heard an answer from the mage, only incessant sighs from Lena.
Then came a notification from the system.
[Stun period over. You can now resume functions]
Ah, great! After EVERY single interesting thing had happened. Now there isn’t even a quest on top of anyone’s head anymore.
At high noon, Rob arrived at the market, guiding a sturdy, well-worn horse pulling a wagon behind him. The creaking of the wooden wheels barely rose above the hum of the busy market, but Lena’s ears perked up the moment she saw him.
“Rob? Who did you Rob the wagon from?” Lena asked, tilting her head. Then her eyes sparkled. “Oh, oh! Did you hear that? I just made an excellent pun!”
Rob, wiping the sweat off his brow, patted the horse’s neck. “We’re going to be on the road for who knows how long, so I figured we’d need something reliable. Carrying all our belongings on our backs doesn’t seem like a great idea.”
Lena blinked. “Wait. You bought this?”
Rob nodded. “The whole thing, plus the horse, cost me only five silver coins. A bargain, right?”
Lena narrowed her eyes. “That sounds… suspiciously cheap. Does this horse have lung fever?”
Rob shrugged. “The seller said it was his late uncle’s, and the wagon has been sitting in a shed gathering dust, so he just wanted to get rid of it. I checked it over—wheels are solid, no rot, and the horse is healthy. Probably the best deal I’ve ever made.”
Lena crossed her arms. “And what exactly are we supposed to do with a wagon after this trip?”
Rob grinned. “Plenty of ways to make use of it. I could start a carriage service. Or we could just sell the bulk when we get back. We’d probably get at least four silver, and honestly, five silver was such a steal we won’t even be losing much if we sell for less.”
Lena considered this for a moment, then asked, “How much do we have left?”
“A little over two silver coins.” Rob gave her a knowing look. “Which means we’ll need to pick up odd jobs to cover our expenses.”
Lena grinned. “Oh, don’t worry about that! I’ve got it covered. I’ll learn the most useful spells tonight, and you’ll come with me.”
Rob raised an eyebrow. “To meet the robed mage?”
“The very one.”
He scrunched his nose but nodded. “Fine. If you think it’ll help.”
“But before that, we’ll need to attend temple services.”
“I’ll pass that one,” Rob exhaled sharply as he climbed on the horse. “I promised Kieran I’d deliver him some apples for 15 shillings.”
You will go to the mage, but won’t go to the temple?
“Ah! It’s just 15 shillings. His apples won’t rot in a day. You’re just making excuses again.”
“Money is money.”
“Robert!” Lena stomped on the ground. “Priest Zumakan reminded us that while it is sufficient to attend hearings and pray once a month, it is your duty as a Paladinborn, and by extension my duty as a Temple devotee and as a wife of a Paladinborn to see to the temple’s matters semi-regularly. We should at least pray more often.”
Rob shrugged with the same nonchalance he’d exhibited as with most matters in life. “I don’t see the need to, given that the Lords of Light have neglected me all my life.”
“He has blessed us with a pretty good life so far, don’t you think?”
“You can pray on my behalf then, Lena. Surely you have the faith to receive plenty of blessings for the both of us.”
“I’ve already done so last month!” Lena huffed. “The Priest specifically asked me to, for a lack of better word, insist you attend temple services.”
There we have it! A Paladinborn who doesn’t believe in Paladinhood, and a non-Paladin who seemingly loves everything spectral and divine. What a great combination for growth. Not.
On another note… The believers in this world don’t seem too overzealous. At least these two seem like a normal bunch who don’t talk about the Lords ever, apart from that one time they did unspeakable things to me while sitting on me.
It would be exactly like Lena to only ever be praying to the Lord after she’s sinned and is asking for forgiveness. And it would be exactly like Rob to not give a dang. Guy doesn’t seem to ever care about anything but his farm and his wife.
Rob and Lena were still having their heated discussion. Rob said, “We don’t have time, Lena. Your father wants us to be on our way tomorrow!”
“Which is why we need to be at the temple by the 9th hour! I will close shop early and we can get there in time. You’re not losing out on anything. And I need you to be be with me when we meet the mage tonight.”
Rob didn’t say anything, instead just stared at her and instinctively grabbed the horse bridle.
“Pretty please? Pretty pleaseeee?” Lena interlocked her fingers into a lock.
Rob locked eyes with her for the longest time. “Okay.”
