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ROGUES | S01E12: State Lines
🕑 Added 2018-07-26 20:41:19 +0000 UTC ROGUES | S01E12: State Lines(interior of Edward’s car)
EDWARD: What I’m saying is, now that I’ve had time to think about it, I’ve realised that I don’t get nightmares.
JON: Don’t look at me.
EDWARD: If etiquette did not dictate that I had to, I wouldn’t.
JON: You never get nightmares?
EDWARD: Nope. I sleep like a baby; a side benefit of a clear conscience.
JON: (snorts)
EDWARD: You did something to me while I was sleeping, didn’t you?
JON: Don’t you trust me?
EDWARD: Not with that “who, me?” smirk spread across your face like congealed butter.
JON: Maybe you ate too much ice cream before bed.
EDWARD: Oh, ho ho. An old wives’ tale. Delightful. You’re making fun of me, aren’t you?
JON: Wouldn’t dream of it.
EDWARD: You’re not funny. You think you are, but you’re not.
JON: Bitch, I’m hilarious.
EDWARD: (shocked laugh)
JON: Y’see?
EDWARD: What do you know - you do still have the capacity to surprise me.
JON: Wonders never cease. Neither does this damn music. (changes the station)
EDWARD: Hey! (turns it back)
JON: This is giving me a headache. (changes it)
EDWARD: That’ll be your brain, rattling around your cranium like Pong. (changes it)
JON: How d’you even get these stations out here? (changes it)
EDWARD: (changes it) I modded it, like I mod everything.
JON: Still sucks. (changes it) And sucks too loud.
EDWARD: What do you know about music? (changes it) You have a snore that sounds like a toothless chainsaw lodged in a California redwood.
JON: What has that got to do with anythin’? (changes it)
EDWARD: It proves that you’re tone deaf. (changes it) Even when you’re asleep.
JON: Well, you snore like someone who has a flute jammed up their nose. (changes it)
EDWARD: That’ll be the broken nose I got, Jon - you remember that? (changes it)
JON: (laughs) I remember it shut you up for a while. (changes it)
EDWARD: You’re all bleeding heart, Doctor. (changes it)
JON: Should see my bedside manner. (changes it)
EDWARD: Last seen on a milk carton somewhere in Sarasota. (changes it)
JON: You don’t stop touchin’ it, you’re gonna break it. (changes it)
EDWARD: (snickers) That’s just what the school nurse used to tell you. (changes it)
JON: My last nurse told me it ain’t a flag; let it touch the ground. (changes it)
EDWARD: (laughs) That’s twice! Two jokes in as many minutes! Who are you, and what did you do with Jonathan Crane? (changes it)
JON: Drank him to death. (chuckles, turns it off) Off, then. When did you get so dang stubborn?
EDWARD: It was you, alright?! I learned it by watching you!
(laugh)
(pause)
JON: So you gonna tell me why the road back to Gotham involves drivin’ in the exact opposite direction?
EDWARD: Oh, so you noticed.
JON: Noticed in Tennessee, when my brain started workin’ again.
EDWARD: I wondered how long it would take; (sarcastic) your powers of observation are astounding. You never thought to ask until now?
JON: Figured you’d avoid the question. I like the open road, so it’s not like I really care.
EDWARD: Hm. I should stop for gas, soon; see if there’s any place worth eating at around here. I fear I haven’t eaten well since Virginia.
JON: Y’know, I could take a turn at driving, you want a rest.
EDWARD: Not bloody likely, leadfoot.
JON: You sure? I could really open this baby up.
EDWARD: Not a chance. Besides, I got the seat the way I like. You’ll wreck that with your freakishly long legs.
JON: You sure you’re even comfortable driving?
EDWARD: I’m perfectly capable, thank you.
JON: That why I see you twitchin’ your head like you remembered you’re driving?
EDWARD: … It’s still not what I’d call a necessary skill. On the bright side, I haven’t plowed us into a ditch, yet.
JON: Hm. Give it time.
EDWARD: You know, Q and E make this car look much easier to handle than it is.
JON: I’m sure they’d teach you.
EDWARD: They’re already paid quite enough to laugh at me, thank you.
JON: (chuckles)
EDWARD: Typically I have work to do. Flatfoots tend to frown upon distracted driving.
JON: Can’t imagine why.
EDWARD: Surely the ability to multitask should be admired.
JON: You’d think. Hey - since you spend most of your time locked in the trunk, did you recognise the front seat, when you saw it?
EDWARD: Ha, ha.
JON: What you do back there - your Houdini impression?
EDWARD: Perish needlessly from appendicitis and peritonitis? No.
JON: I could punch you in the gut to find out.
EDWARD: Hands off. Fact is, I do my BeeGee impression.
JON: What?
EDWARD: Stayin’ alive? Q and E saving my skin ensures that Boss Man here lives to cut another fat cheque.
JON: The system works, then.
EDWARD: You bet your ass it does.
(pause)
JON: We’re going to Duluth, ain’t we?
EDWARD: (vaguely impressed huff) Good guess.
JON: Only thing I don’t know is why.
EDWARD: Well, I’ll tell you.
(siren)
EDWARD: Oh, for pity’s sake.
JON: You been speedin’?
EDWARD: Nope. (irritated sigh) This is the last thing I need. What does this idiot want?
JON: Pull over and find out, genius.
EDWARD: If I must.
(pulls over, kills the engine)
EDWARD: Alright. Be nice.
JON: The hell for?
EDWARD: You’re not the deputy mayor of Gotham driving across state lines with a wanted fugitive riding shotgun.
JON: Don’t think I have any warrants out in Minnesota.
EDWARD: You sure about that?
JON: Wait - yes. Yes, I do. (snickers)
EDWARD: Do you remember what it was for?
JON: If memory serves…
EDWARD: Tipping it might encourage it to come back.
JON: Babe the Blue Ox sprung a leak and started sprayin’ toxin everywhere. Somehow.
EDWARD: … Bemidji?
JON: You got it.
EDWARD: (chuckles) What a colourful life you lead. Forget being nice, just be sil ent.
JON: Alright, if you don’t babble.
EDWARD: Excuse me?
JON: You gush like a spotlit actress.
EDWARD: Fuck off, that’s only when I’m caught off guard.
JON: Cops don’t scare you?
EDWARD: (snorts) Please.
JON: Hm. … We could kill him.
EDWARD: Could we now?
JON: Yeah. Ditch his bloated body to the side of the road and the whims of the vultures.
EDWARD: (deadpan) You know how tingly I get when you come over all homicidal.
JON : (snorts) Shut up. You’re thinkin’ about it, ain’t you?
EDWARD: (chuckles) Yes, I am. Deserted highway. I don’t see a camera. Maybe... but let’s see what he wants, first. Directly fighting the law is difficult to come out of clean.
JON: Mm.
(pause)
JON: (singing) Breakin’ rocks in the hot sun… (EDWARD joins in) I fought the law, and the law won; I fought the law, and the law won.
BOTH: (snickering)
EDWARD: Finally, you show some taste.
JON: Took the words right outta my mouth.
EDWARD: Showtime. Shh.
COP: Good afternoon, young fella.
EDWARD: Help you, officer?
COP: Where you off to this fine day?
(pause)
EDWARD: Passing through. Problem?
COP: Well, I don’t pull folks over for my health, son.
EDWARD: … No. I imagine you don’t.
COP: License and registration, son.
(pause)
EDWARD: (impatient noise; rustling) Here.
(pause)
COP: ‘Fraid I’m gonna hafta - (reads) Wait. You’re -
EDWARD: Yes?
COP: You’re Eddie Nashton. Jackie’s boy.
(pause)
EDWARD: (tight smile) So he says.
COP: Haven’t seen you out this way since, (exhales) dang, I don’t even know.
EDWARD: (under his breath) Not long enough.
COP: (looks) Who’s yer friend?
(pause)
EDWARD: Who?
COP: Feller right there.
EDWARD: No one.
COP: Oh yah? Looks like someone to me. What’s your name, friend?
EDWARD: He doesn’t talk.
COP: No?
(pause)
EDWARD: Dumb as a post.
COP: Oh yah?
(pause)
EDWARD: Like I said, we’re just passing through. So if you could -
COP: Hold your horses there, son.
EDWARD: Sure. Interrupt me. (deep breath) What is it?
COP: You got expired tags on ya.
(pause)
EDWARD: Of course I do.
COP: So you see I can’t just let you go.
(pause)
EDWARD: Oh no?
COP: No. Expired tags, ya see.
(pause)
EDWARD: (talking to himself) Someone will suffer for that.
COP: Whassat, son?
EDWARD: (turns) I said I have someone for that.
COP: But you still got expired tags, eh?
(pause; EDWARD lowers his glasses and pinches his nose; frustrated exhale)
(JON starts to whistle TGTB&TU theme under his breath)
COP: Funny. He can’t talk, but he can whistle.
(pause)
EDWARD: Redefines the word dumb.
(pause)
COP: Still, I bet you got a lot on your mind, eh?
EDWARD: Ohh, you have no idea.
COP: Here to see Jackie. Tags slipped your mind?
EDWARD: (temporarily wrong-footed) See - what?
COP: Your pops. Taken a turn for the worse.
EDWARD: Wait a moment. I remember. You’re… Ted Peterson, yes?
COP: That’s some memory on you, son. Can’t have met me more than a couple times.
EDWARD: Exactly twice.
COP: You were just a kid when I saw you last. Bright as a button.
EDWARD: So people said.
COP: Dunno why I didn’t see it soon as l clapped eyes on ya. Pretty like your ma with Jackie’s red hair - that there’s Eddie Nashton, through and through.
(irritated grunt from EDWARD; low laugh from JON)
COP: Oh see, now, now he laughs. He’s not dumb at all.
EDWARD: Dumb as they come, and getting dumber. You were saying?
COP: Yer pops got taken in to St. Joseph’s. Could be any day now, they say.
EDWARD: They say that, do they?
COP: Ahyup. So you’re ‘round this way to come see him, right?
EDWARD: Mercy dash to see dear old Dad one last time, that’s what I’m doing. All other thoughts - whoosh - out the window. (flat) Forget my own head next, boy howdy.
COP: You’re a good boy. Well - I’ll let ya off with a warning then. You go see your Dad. But be sure to renew those tags, little Nashton.
EDWARD: Oh, you betcha. First chance I get.
COP: Give ‘im my regards.
EDWARD: Right.
COP: Take care now. And see to those tags.
(COP leaves and drives away; pause as EDWARD squeezes the wheel)
JON: That was interestin’.
EDWARD: Fascinating.
JON: (scoff) What a good boy you are. I reckon yeh gave me diabetes.
EDWARD: Cholesterol will get you first.
JON: I’ll take a bullet, instead.
EDWARD: That can be arranged. For pity’s sake - when we left Georgia, we drove for hours and you never said a word. Now, when I want you to be quiet, you can’t keep your trap shut.
JON: Me and cops don’t mix.
EDWARD: I should be grateful you didn’t think him a new test subject.
JON: Meh. Cops are all afraid of the same thing.
(pause)
JON: Were you really going to Duluth to see your father?
EDWARD: No, I wasn’t. I was going to drive by the old house. Check up on a couple things.
JON: Now you got to, right?
EDWARD: Mm. I feel compelled to see the old ogre before he kicks his bucket.
JON: You know where this hospital is at?
EDWARD: I got into enough ‘scuffles’ as a kid to know the way there blindfolded.
JON: What was it called, again?
EDWARD: St. Joseph’s.
JON: I’m a little rusty on my saints, but -
EDWARD: Yeah. Patron Saint of the happy death.
JON: That’s some name.
EDWARD: Social realism at its finest. Should I go see my father, it would be malapropos.
JON: This could be good for you, you know - get some closure.
EDWARD: You can fuck right off with that psychobabble bullshit - you killed your father.
JON: I never laid a hand on him.
EDWARD: No. You didn’t have to, did you?
JON: (chuckles) I was there when he died.
EDWARD: Come on. I know you did it, just admit it.
JON: Alright - he died because of me. Can’t say it wasn’t closure.
EDWARD: Now that I know his end is imminent, I wish I’d put the old man down myself.
JON: Not too late.
(pause)
EDWARD: You ever regret it?
(pause)
JON: Nope. Sure as hell love to do it again.
EDWARD: Now that’s what I want to hear.
(pause)
(EDWARD starts the car)
EDWARD: Speaking of… that flatfoot reminded me of something. I have one place I’d like to visit, before I darken Daddy’s doorway.
JON: It’s your dime. Drive on, young Eddie.
EDWARD: Shut your face, unless you actually want to be struck dumb.
JON: Hm.
(pause)
EDWARD: (singing) Robbin’ people with a six-gun, (JON joins in) I fought the law and the law won, I fought the law and the law won...
Comments
Darlingvalkyrie
Man I have catching up to do
I keep going back and relistening to everything...the quality of your work is unparalleled. Show how much time and dedication you have. I appreciate it!!!
