372 Pages We ll Never Get Back
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Episode 36 - We're Baffled By The Cherry Water
🕑 Added 2019-03-22 16:00:15 +0000 UTCThe enigma that is Bob Honey continues to baffle and frustrate us. From offering guests a drink that no human has ever consumed (and they accept??), to possessing a secret preternatural scuba diving activity, to being unable to comprehend basic figures of speech. Oh, and he's a literal superhero we find out too! So that's just delightful.
Our dark web contacts come thru again with more reenactments, Mike tries a social experiment on his patient wife, and a challenging round of Real or Fanfic?
For next time read up to page 121, or right after Pappy Pariah shares his poem.
Comments
RotoLando
Don't neglect the slovelling!
372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
The music came blasting from the yacht that had twinned with the barge. Fischel’s chimera-esque dance partner, red lipstick smeared on her teeth, held a shot of tequila high above her head. Seeing Bob swim toward the barge, her smile widened, the streak of lipstick on her teeth, magnified. Her face vaguely familiar to Bob from channel surfing stables of semi-famous Televisa tarts. This goat-backed lioness began to hoot like a bruxism bedeviled banshee. She stalked toward Bob offering one hand to boost him up onto the barge while exclaiming, “If you don’t drink our TEQUILA, we’ll throw you under the barge!” She laughed with vagarious vulgarity. Thinking herself funny, she flung a shot of tequila into Bob’s facemask. Its drippings streamed glass to mouth. He licked its cheap perfumes with salty lips and grimaced. Though feeling conspicuously out of place, he took the shifty chimera’s hand and boarded the barge, where he dropped his gear. Fischel said to him, “Bobby BOIIIII-EEEEE! Glab yourshelf a shenyorvita. It’s FIESTA time!” So much for Shabbat. Standing at the yacht hull above the christened inscription, Plata o Plomo, was a man of diminutive stature and imposing presence. “Amigo!” he called out to Bob below. Bob smelled the waft of seasoned food. The man on the hull took note, pointing at the ladder where the bikini-clad chimera’s cellulite sloveled its way up. “Come on board, amigos! We’ll eat!”
Thomas Throop
Can someone post the exact description of the chimera on the boat? I want to take a crack at drawing it.
M Williams
The cherry scene was one of the few bright spots in this section for me, so I’ll try an explain my interpretation. Bob has cherries around because anyone who makes mixed drinks has cherries around. I think you are reaching trying to find more symbol than that. Dropping the cherry in is a shit test to the journalist to see what he does. Well, he’s a journalist whose seen way worse than the likes of Bob, so he just drinks it. Then upon departing, he trolls Bob back by saying he “might need it”. I don’t think it’s anything more than a weird Bob power move created at a moment’s notice and the journalist shows he’s not impressed.
Jacob Grudzina
Holy crap! I was laughing at this book until I saw this. Now I just feel kind of bad for the guy. Reminds me of Gene Wilder's last interview.
Carson Heschle
Idk if I can finish this book, you guys. I think "unobtanium" was the moment that forced me to raise the white flag. I tried to give ol' Pappy another chance after that, but the Hasidic Jew and his "Jew-speak" broke me again, and then listening to the "reals" in this episode's Real Or Fanfic killed me. I tried. I tried so hard, and got so far, but in the end, what did it even matter? God bless you for your brave work, sirs, but I might just have to chicken out. 😂😂 PS Please burn a dildo or something in my honor.
Christopher Dazey
Mr. Penn was just on Kimmel where they talked about...<a href="https://youtu.be/XIhM8Xsi0EQ" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://youtu.be/XIhM8Xsi0EQ</a>
Theodore Lehman
I'm about 90% sure we're supposed to regard Bob Honey as a sympathetic character, and that terrifies me.
Jacob Grudzina
Any chance of Patreon members being offered an exclusive ringtone of both of you simultaneously exclaiming the phrase "Sexual Dungeons!"? My "pickled babies" phone alarm from Swamp of the Ravens is starting to lose its charm.
