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Queen of the Sea part 2

🕑 Added 2017-09-08 13:15:47 +0000 UTC

Comments

ElectricMaehem

I love that Brendan is working out! That was a fun challenge for me, trying to make him recognizably the same character, but show how he's both really likable and difficult to be around. I was hoping to hear about him, so thanks.

Anya

I also super like the ghosts. The way their materialize is suuuper cool. I also liked the bit where they talk about witches and sirens, it's nice worldbuilding. Not info dumpy at all. And Brendan is an awesome character. They way you've developed him and the fact that Brianna changed her mind about him is super rare in fiction. Well done. Also Im super interested in learning more about this woman that Brianna is going to play. Really enjoying this so far!

ElectricMaehem

Thank you! I'm having fun with them. Yes, ghost's relative physicality will be explained eventually, but there are some clues going around with things like that and why some people can sense them more readily. I'm really glad to get feedback on this.

furiousfelt

I like how you're developing the ghosts. How they slowly transition into being visible is neat, and different people being able to hear them is cool too. I imagine it will be explained, but do the ghosts have mass? Brianna chose not to sit in the chair that the ghost was materializing in, but the ghost also first is noticeable because she presses down on the chair she sits in, implying she has weight. What would have happened had Brianna chosen to sit in the chair the ghost was sitting in? I'm enjoying your original fiction so far :)


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