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Nero Walker, Book 4 Ch.58 (289)
🕑 Added 2025-02-03 23:30:01 +0000 UTCCathleen turned her head to address Knight Angelton and the other team leaders that were nearby. “Ignore him. Lord Walker will do what he wants, and there is nothing that we can do about it.”
Knight Angelton replied somewhat unhappily, “But, he shouldn’t be here. You saw what happened. He was summoned by the Populators and the archmage himself. He has duties that require him to be in Dorchester. There is no way he addressed them all in the short time he’s been gone.”
One of the mage team leaders, Leader Banks, muttered a little too loudly, “The troops are wondering if he’s going to disband the Wackos.”
Grumbling loudly enough for everyone to hear her, one of the melee team leaders muttered, “Why shouldn’t he? We were practically useless out there.”
Cathleen heard them, but a majority of her attention remained on the conversation she was currently having with Lady Verena over the communication orb in her pocket.
Everyone knew whom she was talking to, so they didn’t expect her to answer.
Knight Angelton took control of the situation by harshly shouting, “Don’t repeat such unfounded rumors! Lord Walker personally selected every one of us. Despite coming back to escort us back to Dorchester, he doesn’t doubt our capabilities.”
Seeing as everyone was still looking ashamed of themselves, he added, “You need to remember, he’s still young and new to leadership. When I was a freshly minted sergeant myself, I mistakenly took on most of my team’s enemies myself, leaving my subordinates to feel slighted. It took time for me to begin trusting them.”
Blackwood, ever eager to support his friend, spoke up, “That’s right. This was our first major engagement. And we didn’t have a lot of time to prepare for it. We’ll do better in the future.”
Cathleen caught everyone off guard by snorting in amusement, causing everyone to look over at her in confusion.
Her conversation through the communication orb over, her attention returned to the conversation currently going on around her. “According to Lady Verena, Lord Walker returning here had nothing to do with us. He’s just running from the nobles.”
Knight Angelton, speaking for everyone, expressed their confusion quite nicely by asking, “The nobles? What do they have to do with anything?”
Cathleen replied, “It seems that after having dealt with the Populators and the Battleborns, Lord Walker declined to participate in the strategy session the archmage tried to hold this morning. Rather than confront the cesspit of politics in Dorchester, Lord Walker chose to return to us. The young lord is a budding war god, it’s only natural for him to want to continue fighting.”
Natalie Keening, who’d been silently listening nearby, asked eagerly, “So, Lord Walker hasn’t lost faith in us? He doesn’t consider our performance unsatisfactory?”
Everyone around her looked eager to hear Cathleen’s response. Natalie’s little cadre of supporters had taken Lord Walker’s reappearance worse than anyone else. As House Walker’s social representative, she hadn’t been able to muster up the confidence to reassure them of anything.
Snorting in amusement once again, Cathleen replied, “You all should realize by now that Lord Walker has no concept of what normal warfare looks like. He humiliated the entire army by ending the fight at the tunnel entrance on the mountain practically all on his own, and have any of you heard him boasting about it? It likely hasn’t even occurred to him how his presence here might look. As House Walker’s leaders, your responsibility is to ensure that slanders against his character like this do not spread. When we get back into range of the Battle Hub, ensure that the first thing you do is address this issue before it becomes a more serious problem.”
Knight Angelton nodded in agreement before adding, “We all need to remember that Lord Walker is not like us. He’s a unique, an existence that we can’t possibly comprehend. We’d be better served focusing on ourselves, and remembering his words. ‘It’s up to every one of you to decide how high you will grow. No one else’. Remind your troops of that wisdom, and yourselves as well.”
Every one of them nodded in understanding while firming both their expressions and their hearts.
—--
The formation hadn’t had all that much of a head start, so Nero didn’t expect to have any trouble catching up with them. On the way, he looked around at what remained of the kobald encampment and couldn’t help but feel a little proud of what they’d accomplished. Pulling his eyes away from the ruins, he could see the formation not too far in the distance. Even with their lead, they’d barely made it into one of the tunnels.
Considering that the only reason they were abandoning their camp was that the kobalds were coming, he found their unhurried and meandering pace a little suspect.
Jogging up to a group of troops who seemed to be waiting for him, he greeted them loudly, “Don’t worry, I’m here. We can get going.”
The Wackos standing there in their House Walker-themed cloaks exchanged uncomfortable glances with each other before one of them replied, “My lord, we were ordered to stay behind to relay instructions to the scout teams that haven’t yet returned from their patrols. Do you wish to remain with us?”
Slowing to a stop right in front of them, Nero looked at each of them in turn before replying, “Um… No. You all have it under control. I’m sure. I just… I mean… You all stay safe.”
Without another word, Nero resumed his jog. He felt his face reddening from the embarrassment of the assumption he’d just made. But, it wasn’t just that. He could tell the three of them had felt uncomfortable at the idea of him joining them. They didn’t want him there.
Grimacing as his thoughts raced, he quickly caught up with the rear of the formation. Upon his arrival, the scene he’d just suffered through repeated itself. He could immediately tell that the Wackos weren’t all that overjoyed with his presence. Which, for him, was weird.
Up until now, the Wackos had been his super fans. It had gotten to a point where it had been somewhat annoying. But now, he was realizing that them not wanting him around was infinitely worse.
As he slipped through the ranks, he heard polite greetings left and right. They weren’t ignoring him, or treating him disrespectfully in any way. It was just that their essence fields were making it very clear how they felt seeing him. There were undercurrents of shame and anger mixed with their usual admiration broadcasting through the ether making the area a sea of hostility. Nero didn’t understand it at all.
Even though Cathleen hadn’t ordered him to, Nero returned to the middle of the formation with the rest of the casters just like before. He wanted to find Merrick. Hopefully, with a little bit more probing, he’d be able to figure out what was happening.
The moment he saw him, Nero rushed right up to him and began quick-marching alongside him.
“Hey, we didn’t get to finish our conversation,” Nero said quickly.
Merrick, seemingly surprised to see him, replied, “Of course, my lord. What can I do for you?”
Frowning in annoyance at the man’s overly polite tone. Nero considered for a moment that Merrick might be mocking him. But, everything he was sensing through the man’s essence field made it clear that he was being genuine. Just like the rest of the Wackos, he seemed to still respect him but was uncomfortable having to be around him.
Sighing, Nero asked, “Merrick, level with me here. What’s going on? Why is everyone treating me like I’m the school’s disgraced quarterback? I didn’t throw a 4th quarter interception to lose them the big game, and I sure as hell didn’t do anything to deserve this. Didn’t we just close the portal and save the city? Shouldn’t everyone be a little more upbeat? Where’s the sense of victory and pride? I’m not saying I deserve a medal or anything, but a little gratitude would be nice.”
Judging by Merrick’s expression, Nero assumed the world’s translation magic was doing a number on him. After mentally reminding himself that he should ease up on the unfamiliar metaphors, Nero waited patiently for Merrick’s brain to reboot.
Having digested Nero’s word vomit, Merrick replied, “My lord, as I said before, they are likely just uncomfortable with you having chosen to return. We could have gotten ourselves back to Dorchester on our own. We’re grateful for your protection, but… it’s unnecessary.”
Nearly snarling at hearing the exact same thing as before, Nero took a moment to mentally review what he’d learned. He understood what they were saying, but the question remained as to ‘why’ they felt that way. Nero could only conclude that he wasn’t asking the right questions.
Rather than waste his time in a metaphorical echo chamber, Nero tried to mentally alter the way he was coming at it.
After barely a minute of private contemplation, he was brought out of his reverie by the sound of fighting coming from further up the formation. He instantly felt his adrenaline spike, his entire body preparing itself for battle. He felt his center churn while he began gathering the required essence to create his essence shield. But, before he could even consider pushing through the Wackos in front of him to get up there, he could tell that it was already over.
‘It must have been a small group of kobalds that got lost on their way to the bathroom or something,’ he thought to himself.
The formation hadn’t even bothered to alter their pace, and all too soon he was able to see the after-effects of the ‘battle’. There were a few kobald bodies thrown against the walls along with some broken weapons. He could tell that the kobalds had appeared from one of the side tunnels coming off this junction. And just as he’d suspected, it had been nothing to worry about.
Choosing to examine what he was feeling, Nero realized that he might be more than a little on edge. But, why shouldn’t he be? They just went through a big battle and lost some people. It was only right that he was feeling a little overprotective, wasn’t it?
Jennings and everyone else had been giving him shit for not being more emotionally involved in what was happening, so they should all be happy that he was taking responsibility. He was the head of House Walker, everything that happened was on him. He hadn’t asked for it, but he was trying to be worthy of the title.
So, what had he done wrong? Why did they expect him to stay in Dorchester? How does his being here somehow insult them?
Looking around and studying the somewhat ashamed looks on everyone’s faces, Nero nearly scoffed when he finally recognized the emotion they were feeling. It was the same one kids get when their parents tag along to an event that they had no business attending… like a high school dance or a first date.
‘Just like they said, they’re worried that I think they can’t handle take care of themselves,’ he thought to himself, while mentally imagining the sight of Merrick standing there in a tux two sizes too big for him screaming at the top of his lungs, ‘Why can’t you just let me live my life!’
Suddenly, he erupted in silent anger. After all the shit he’d gotten about not caring about the people who’d pledged their lives to him, now they had the audacity to be pissed that he was worried about them!
Trying to keep the anger pushed down far enough that it didn’t affect his expression, Nero continued on in silence for a bit. He was overreacting and he knew it.
He recalled a lesson he once heard back in the day from his former manager when he’d first accepted the job of a shift manager. The pothead of an old man had told him that being in charge didn’t mean taking on more responsibility, it was more about being able to pick and choose the right things to worry about. Nero remembered having quickly learned how true that statement had been.
As an employee, all he’d had to worry about was his job. Whether or not he’d made it to work on time and how best to avoid pissing off the customers enough so that they wouldn’t demand to see the manager. But, the moment he’d become in charge, he’d had to start worrying about sales figures and scheduling, interpersonal disputes and dress codes, and various other headache-inducing minutiae. And, even worse, when other people screwed up… he was the manager who the customers ended up complaining to.
Now, in this new position as lord of a house, he no longer had the privilege of ignoring the local customs. Up until now, he’d been able to just silently judge them for their idiocy and go on about his day feeling superior. But, if he was truly going to take responsibility for his position, then it wasn’t enough to just apply his morals and beliefs to the position. He instead needed to look at things from their perspective and begin acting like the lord they expected him to be.
While he pondered this new revelation, he was reminded of a time when he’d had to convince an employee to start caring about her job. She had been a good-looking girl whose sales figures were always high. Everyone she talked to loved her. But, she constantly called off work and missed shifts. And even when she’d been on time, she spent half her shift on her phone in the breakroom. But, he couldn’t fire her, she was his best salesman… salesperson… whatever.
In the end, he’d accomplished his personal mission to get her to give a shit. It had taken a clever narrative about how she could one day become an influencer. She’d be able to look back on her time at her job and brag to people about how hard she worked. The more effort she put in now, the more she’d be able to complain about it later. Unsurprisingly, she loved the thought of being able to tell people about her struggles and looked forward to how impressed her future followers would be when they heard about them. Luckily, it hadn’t occurred to her that she would just be able to lie and say that she used to bust her ass when she really hadn’t.
Turning to look over at Merrick, Nero could see the man was still feeling down.
“Hey, Merrick. You know that I didn’t come back because I worried you all were going to fail, right? You Wackos are my personal forces. We accomplished something great here. We saved the city!” Nero ended in a shout.
He wanted more than just Merrick to hear what he had to say. He needed them all to shift their thinking more in line with how he saw things. Sure, he could have just bent and begun looking at their world the way they did, but wouldn’t it be easier just to convince them to follow his lead? After all, he was the one who was right, and nobody would be able to convince him otherwise.
Keeping his tone as serious as possible, Nero said, “The battle for the portal may be over, but the fighting isn’t finished until every one of us makes it back to Dorchester. As lord of House Walker, it is my duty to be here with you. I couldn’t just abandon you. It’s not about whether or not I think you could handle it, or how well any of you fight. It’s about what kind of leader I want to be. This is a ‘me’ issue, not a ‘you’ issue.”
Raising his voice even louder, Nero added, “In the days to come, we’ll all be facing enemies and quests that will require us to work together if we want to survive. Every one of us needs to be there for one another, through thick and thin, famine and feast, success and failure. Together we rise, alone we shall fall. You understand what I’m saying?”
Merrick nodded but did not seem all that convinced. “My lord, if I may?”
Nero bit back his complaint at the man’s absurdly deferential tone and gestured for him to say what he had to say.
“Every Oglivarchian knows that following a powerful leader will help them along their path. But when a leader is so far above us that we can’t keep up, there are only two outcomes. One, the leader is forced to hold themselves back, wasting their potential to protect and defend their weaker subordinates. Or two, allowing their followers to die in droves until the few that can overcome the odds grow strong enough to stand alongside them,” Merrick said seriously, his tone making it clear that he wasn’t joking.
To Nero’s right, a Wacko he didn’t recognize added, “We all respect you, My lord. And we all are proud to serve you. But, you closed that portal on your own. You nearly wiped out the kobalds with your magics, depleting your center and killing yourself to protect us. There is much for each of us to prove. You have your own battles to fight, you should have left ours to us.”
Nero frowned in thought, realizing that they must be under the misconception that he’d somehow died for them. That hadn’t been what happened. He’d killed himself due to stupidity while infusing his center with unfiltered essence that had still been encoded with an identity.
Opening his mouth by reflex, Nero bit back his reply as he had no idea how to begin explaining what had actually happened.
Merrick took advantage of Nero’s hesitation to add, “Coming back like you did, it’s natural for us to feel that you are worried about us. And while we are glad that you care, it also makes us feel like we have failed you. We joined you to walk alongside you, not to be sheltered by you.”
All around him, Nero could see multiple people nodding. They all looked as if Merrick had found the perfect words to express the discontent they were feeling. He almost expected them to shout, ‘Here, Here!’ or something.
Fed up with the situation, Nero replied, “Well that’s just stupid.”
Seeing everyone recoiling from what they perceived as an insult, he instinctively reworded what he’d just said, “I mean… You’re just being stupid.”
His attempt didn’t have the desired effect, as they recoiled even further and began looking like cats after they’d been sprayed in the face with water to stop them from scratching up the couch cushions.
Running his hand through his hair, Nero tried again, “Look, you’re looking at this all wrong. I get that you are all focused on your paths and crap. I mean, I really do. But, what about the path of House Walker as a whole? Just because we all together as a group don’t have a level, doesn’t mean that we can’t work together for the betterment of all, right? I mean, look at your cities, aren’t they treated as independent entities in the sight of the kingdom? Why are you all so hellbent on kicking out anyone who rises higher than the ones around them? Sure, I may be a little more powerful than you, but that’s just life. There is always going to be someone stronger, someone better. That doesn’t mean that you can’t still make progress on your own. It’s about your mindset. Not every challenge has to be met with equivalent force. You see me running ahead and clearing out the tunnels in front of us to allow you all to avoid fighting your way back to Dorchester? Of course you don’t. I came back here for moral support. And if we run into something that is too powerful for you, then you shouldn’t feel bad for me stepping up and taking care of it. Should you?”
Chuckling to himself, Nero said, “Listen to me, sounding like I’m some kind of super weapon. Your bullshit is infecting me. You all remember that most of our higher-level people like Knight Angelton and Battle Leader Averett can kick my ass, don’t you?”
One of the Wackos walking nearby shouted, “Not if you use your magic!” before catching himself and submissively adding, “My lord…”
Seeing everyone nodding in agreement, Nero chuckled. “Maybe that’s true, maybe it's not. The point is that everyone has their strengths. The important thing I want you to understand is that we’re all in this together. Personal strength is something you pursue on your own, so that we all, as a whole, become a better capable force of handling bigger and bigger adventures in the future.”
Happy to see them all thinking deeply over what he’d just said, Nero added, “And, in the future, if one or two of you grow to a point where you become stronger than those around you, then you need to understand that I will not pull you away from the fighting or treat you like you're special. The goal of any adventurer is to be special all on their own. Always remember that your only competition is the you from yesterday.”
Even after having said something so cringeworthy, Nero didn’t find himself feeling all that bad about it. In fact, he felt like was finally feeling comfortable sounding like the motivational speaker recent circumstances have forced him to become.
Almost immediately after realizing he didn’t feel like a tool for having spouted out such convincing nonsense, he mentally kicked himself for taking himself too seriously.
‘Never start believing your own bullshit. That’s the first warning sign that you’re about to get canceled,’ Nero warned himself harshly.
*Chapter Title: Finding common ground.
*Spoiler: Everyone has an opinion. That shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone. What people tend to forget, however, is that opinions are shaped by both available information and personal histories. Then, to compound that misconception, those few people who remember that tend to conclude that reality itself is a matter of interpretation. It's not. Objective truth is not something that should be discounted as irrelevant. What is important is to remember that our own opinions are suspect, and that we should always strive to broaden our perspective to be better able to interpret what's actually happening around us.
The only reason I was thinking about this was because I just recently got in an argument about whether or not Taco Bell should be considered Mexican food. After around 30 minutes of debate, we settled on calling it Mexican inspired cuisine and moved on... only to then have someone who had been eavesdropping on our conversation emphatically declare that Taco Bell was not 'cuisine', it was instead merely fast food. Which then, of course, started a whole other debate on the nature of being pretentious. By the time I stepped back and realized that I had gotten way to invested in this chain of topics, it was already too late.
Looking at it logically, it doesn't matter what anyone calls it. A chalupa's existence isn't predicated on what we call it.
Comments
Jeffrey Shabel
A chalupa by any other name would produce the same amount of vomit.
Jeffrey Shabel
"I will not pull you away from the fighting or treat you like your special." : your -> you're
